The muddy helmet is used in reference to a residue of shit that remains on the head or just below the head of the cock after anal sex. So when the dude pulls out and there’s a brown smear of poop on the head of his dick. It happens to the best of us. There’s no need to make your lover feel bad about it. Like, it shouldn’t happen every time you have an anal fuck, but it’s bound to happen occasionally. Every so often is fine but if you’re finding that it’s happening often, you should consider getting your ass douched before anal. You should also make sure not to have anal after a big meal or before you’ve had a bowel movement. There shouldn’t be poop right in your asshole because shit doesn’t normally just hang out there waiting to pour out at any moment. You squeeze it out and anything that doesn’t come out just gets sucked back up your ass and waits until it’s time to shit again. So your anal track should be clear and free.
People get anxious about this kind of thing constantly, but there’s really no need. Yeah, you’ll have accidents every so often, but most of the time you should be able to get a good ass pounding without worrying about shitting all over your boyfriend’s dick. If it does happen, don’t sweat it. Your boyfriend will just wash his dick and then you can blow him to kingdom come and he’ll forget all about it. So long as you don’t gag while giving him head and then accidentally throw up on his cock. It’s fair to say that if he gets your shit and your puke on his dick within the period of a half an hour it’s likely that he’s going to get pretty freaked out and possibly dump your ass. So make sure not to shove his cock too far down your throat in this particular situation. If he hasn’t just has poop on his dick, it’s probably find to vomit on his cock, just a little, but if he gets shit AND vomit on his dick he’s going to start thinking about how fucking you is more like taking care of a baby and that just gets awkward.
And ladies, if you’re pegging him and some shit gets on that dildo you call your cock, don’t worry about it. Just wash it off with soap and water and then slide it down his throat. He’ll make sure to keep his ass clean if he knows his mouth is going to get a pounding after every anal fuck fest.
1. My boyfriend loves a cock in his ass but he’s got irritable bowel syndrome. How can I prevent us from running into a muddy helmet situation?
2. The last time I had a muddy helmet I was in the army. Damn those army boys have a ton of shit up their asses. Probably from all the pegging they get just to loosen them up.
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