A Yes Girl, also known as a “Leanne,” is about the best thing that can happen to a guy on a Friday night. Yes girls are like the Yes Men of the business world; they literally say yes to everything, any time, no matter what. In the dating world, if you’re ever lucky enough to find yourself a yes girl, they’re like a fantasy world of sexual desires all rolled up into one female vagina.
Ever wondered what it would feel like to have a threesome? Well, ask the yes girl and she’ll be back at your apartment with her hot blonde friend before you can even get an erection. Feel like trying anal and your girlfriend never lets you? Well, talk to the Yes Girl. She’ll even agree to sworn secrecy, so your girlfriend will never find out.
Yes girls are good for all kinds of other fantasies, which are far dirtier and more perverse. If you’ve always secretly wanted to get your asshole fingered by a giant zucchini while a girl vomits all over your penis, well, that yes girl can oblige. Hell, you’ve got a thing for midgets in baby diapers? Well, invite one over and watch the Yes Girl cradle rob that little guy all night long. You see, even if you’re not actually involved in the sex, a Yes Girl will still agree to any sexual encounter that you suggest. It’s programmed inside them; they have no idea how to say No. It’s one of God’s true miracles.
The only real danger of a Yes girl is that guys often fall in love with them, because on the surface, they appear to be the perfect woman. That may be true while we’re still young and virile and want to try as many twisted routes of reaching orgasm as possible, but as we get older we start to crave stability and something more wholesome. And believe me, there is absolutely nothing wholesome about a yes girl. Far too many men have foolishly fallen in love with a Yes Girl, only to have their hearts broken and their libido crushed. Just keep this one rule in mind: A yes girl isn’t just a Yes girl for you; she can’t say no, to anyone. So, unless you’re planning on tying her up in a basement for the rest of her life (which she’d be totally fine with, by the way) you can’t try to make a wife or girlfriend out of a Yes Girl. She’ll be cheating on you the second she leaves the front door and the local construction worker or mailman hits on her. It’s just in their nature. Like a stray alley cat, she’ll go wherever someone calls her and feeds her.
1. Steve once dated a Yes Girl for an entire Month. It was awful. He’s really into rape fantasies, and it’s true what they say, you can’t rape the willing.
2. If you ever suspect you’ve found a Yes Girl at the bar, make sure you ask her for a blowjob within the first 3 minutes of conversation. If she giggles and smiles at you, she’s a Yes Girl.
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