In an average day, a man will come within visual contact of approximately 130 women. And on average, five of these women will be attractive to the point of conscious recollection for the act of self-pleasuring. The accumulation of these images in the brain is called a wank bank, and it’s located in the lower left part of the hypothalamus.
Wank banks can hold hundreds of mental pictures and can be retrieved with great ease or upon some serious digging into the edge of the conscious mind. This depends on the urgency of the action at “hand”. If a guy wants a quick jerk to put him to sleep, a familiar picture is used – even a recent encounter from earlier that day. But if he wants to get more into it, he can delve into the depths of the boner zone of the brain to recall that busty brunette he took note of a month before.
Wank banks can come in extremely handy in a number of situations. It’s 11pm and there’s a massive power-outage. TV is off. Internet is down. And that last bit of porn you kept hidden on your hard drive is inaccessible because your laptop battery lasts a whopping two-and-a-half minutes. Time for a wank bank withdraw. And hey, it’s quicker than using an actual ATM and there are no service charges. It’s also as secure as a Swiss bank account, unlike your perverted hard drive.
Or you’re camping at a secluded lake with some buddies for a weekend away from the nagging girlfriends. Looking out at the lake one night, you notice some drunken frat girls skinny dipping a couple miles away. After a failed attempt at a drunken swim, you get some binoculars and take in the naughty hotties. A few minutes of this will give you an ample deposit for later on in your tent. Note: always bring your own tent.
But let’s say you see a butterface out there in the water and cower at the thought of tapping that one, even from behind. There’s absolutely no harm in Frankensteining her body with a hotter mug. And hey, go right ahead and grow her tits a few cups and bring that ass up an inch or two. There’s only one rule for the wank bank: no dogs allowed.
A wank bank need not contain only images, either. That’s the best part. Say your personal secretary is strictly hands-off. Yet the other day her ass grazes your shoulder as she turns around. Even though it was an honest accident, there’s no harm in banking that firm can and using it later that night when you’re lying awake next to a stiff corpse of a partner.
Wank banks are a growing phenomena with women, as well. Chests, dicks, asses, faces, arms… you name it! They can all be saved for later for vibrator or manual stimulation. Just hope to hell she doesn’t close her eyes to withdraw while she’s on top of you!
1. Baby, you’ve been in my wank bank for over a year. Let’s do it.
2. I can’t find my Hustler… guess I’ll use the wank bank for inspiration.
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