A sex coma is a very serious medical condition, just like a regular coma, only this one is induced by an extremely intense, prolonged sexual experience or sexually related trauma, such as Brazilian fecal fetishes performed on the unwilling, or a midget getting gang raped by the Lesbian Sumo Wrestling team from Japan.
In medical terms, a sex coma involves the complete loss of consciousness and total bodily paralysis following an abnormally extensive sexual experience that is so mind-blowing or traumatic that the neural circuitry in the human brain can no longer function, hence the person falls into a coma. There are both negative and positive sex comas, which are equally dangerous but are triggered by completely different experiences. Also, there is absolutely no way of telling how long a person will be in a coma. It could last a few minutes, a few hours, or even a few years. In fact, it’s rumored that Osama Bin Laden didn’t go into hiding intentionally the few years preceding his death. According to rumors spread by the FBI, Osama Bin Laden had a particularly intense sexual experience with his favorite female goat in celebration of his achievement of 911. Immediately post orgasm, Bin Laden fell into a deep sex coma that lasted several years. Some reporters have even speculated that when the FBI and American soldiers found him, he was still deep in a sex coma, which is why they wouldn’t release the photos of his deceased body (everyone knows that when a person is in a sex coma, they continue to display an erection and orgasm every 45-75 minutes. You can imagine how disgusting his corpse would have been after several years of wet dreams in a dark, dirty cave).
Some known causes of sex comas for the average, non-goat-fucking individual, include things like multiple orgasms in a single fuck, double or triple blowjobs by hot blonds, or even the first orgy experience. Strangely enough, a great deal of men suffer sex comas after a single night spent with a hot redheaded slut. Even if all they do is missionary style, one on one fucking, the red heads are so crazy in bed that they often induce comas in their sexual partners/victims.
Another common perpetrator of sex comas are Sex Panthers (see: sex panthers). According to hospital reports in 2003 from Las Vegas, 87% of all patients admitted into the ER for sex coma symptoms were out at a casino and got pounced on by a sex panther. Unfortunately, as they saying goes, what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, so many of those men are still lying in a hospital bed in a sex coma, and will probably never return to their families back home.
1. Doctors believe that a regular coma victim will respond well to a loved one who speaks to them on a daily basis, and it has been known to help bring them out of their coma. Sex coma victims don’t respond to regular conversations, but they have been reported to show brain stimulation if a friend or loved one whispers dirty talk into their ear.
2. After I came out of my sex coma, my cock muscles were so atrophied that I couldn’t get an erection for an entire year. Physiotherapy was a hell of a lot of fun though!
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