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Quim is a slang word for a woman’s vagina dating back to Old English. It can also be used to describe the juices that flow out of a female vagina during orgasm, known today as “squirting” or “ female ejaculation.” It is important to understand the two usages of the word in order to avoid misunderstandings, especially between a man and a woman, or a high class and lower class person.
When taking the literal, more technical definition of ‘the vagina,’ it is important to recognize how useful this word can be to so many men out there. Because the word sounds so unbelievably classy, and it is largely unused in the English language, it is often a great way for businessmen, teachers, doctors, lawyers, camp counselors, priests, or fathers hiring a babysitter, to talk dirty without getting slapped or charged with sexual harassment. For example, a priest might announce to his congregation, “I want all the quims worshipping here today, to accept the lord Jesus Christ inside them, over and over and over again, until your legs are weak and your mind is aflutter with the lord’s doings.”
Similarly, a doctor might say to the patient who is receiving a physical, “You’re a very healthy young woman. Your blood pressure is normal, your reflexes are great, and you’ve got one of the healthiest, best looking Quims I’ve seen in my entire medical career. In fact, I’d love to bring in a few of my male colleagues to study and examine your Quim, if that’s ok with you?” As you can see, this is an extremely useful term that could save you millions of dollars in lawsuits. If you replaced the word Quim with pussy or vagina in these situations, it would never work.
As for the second use of the word, meaning vaginal discharge during orgasm, this is much harder to use without getting in trouble. However, because Quim is an extremely old-fashioned slang word for female ejaculation, it can be useful during time period role-playing. For example, while dressed in a top hat and knickers, one could whisper in the dame’s ear, “You’re a naughty bird, aren’t you? Go ahead, forthright, and quim all over my face!” This type of usage goes over extremely well with any girl who has a fetish for British accents.
Like nearly all British slang words for sexual acts, Quimming was first popularized by Queen Mary I in 1555, when the local court jester was down on his knees performing oral sex on her, and Queen Mary exclaimed, “By all that is holy in heaven, and by the grace of God, I’m about to Quim!!!” Needless to say, since that was Queen Mary’s first time ejaculating during orgasm, that particular jester soon found himself a new, much higher paying job.
1. Joey loved sitting in the front row in class, because every time Ms. Loverly wore a white skirt, he could totally see her Quim.
2. When my girlfriend first told me she want to Quim all over my face, I thought she was asking if she could give me a golden shower.
RELATED TERMS:
Squirting