Click To Enlarge
A Mastercard Mary is a slang term for a high class prostitute or escort. This is because only a high class escort takes credit cards, whereas your average whore on the street is a cash-only enterprise.
Bareback Blowjob: $200
Sex: $300
Anal Sex: $500
Dressing up like Trinity from ‘The Matrix’ and pegging you with a strap-on while you masturbate over the picture of your high school sweetheart in your senior yearbook: PRICELESS!
There is nothing enough money can’t buy.
For everything you can think of, there’s Mastercard Mary.
Because we’re talking about a high-class escort here, there are certain advantages they have over your run-of-the-mill street walker. For example, if you go through a n escort agency, you can specify exactly what kind of woman you want. Want her to be barely legal or a MILF? They can do that. Want her to be tall or petite? They can do that? What’s your favorite tit size and hair color? They’ve got it. Shit, man – you can get a set of twins that will provide the girlfriend experience before switching to the porn star experience if you wanted. If you’ve got the money, honey, they’ve got you covered.
The nice thing about an escort, as opposed to a street walker, is that you can order her just like room service, and they will show up at your door. If you’re married, I suggest you get yourself a room in a nice hotel. Unless your wife is into it, which some are. Hell, if you want, you can order the little woman a male escort of her own if you wanted. It’s an equal opportunity world, when it comes to money for sex. Maybe your wife has always fantasized about being with a muscular black man with a monster penis. Get her one for her birthday.
He comes to the house. You film her getting fucked by him. Memories that will last forever. She’ll probably have to start a Kegel exercise regiment to strengthen her pussy after the black guy stretched her out. Otherwise it’ll be hotdog down a hallway time for you. Do not want.
The nice thing about using your credit card to pay for an escort is that you don’t have to have the money on hand. You can worry about paying for it later, which is nice when you’re really horny. Most escorts won’t actually put on the bill “Sex for Money”. They’ll have some innocuously named company that will charge you. The clever ones put something noble as their company name. Like “Charity Incorporated”. That way, if the wife does see it, she thinks you gave to some charity. In reality, you gave it to a whore named Charity.
1. Ned was devastated after his wife died of spontaneous combustion. His brother decided to rent him a Mastercard Mary to help. The escort’s huge, real tits and twenty year-old firm body helped Ned to begin the healing process.
2. A Mastercard Mary is also known as a Visa Vagina.
RELATED TERMS: