A liaison is a secretive or illicit love affair. A rendezvous, or secret meeting to have sex, if you will. Often it occurs at a location that is neutral for the two having the affair, usually a hotel where they can keep things private.
Privacy is a strange thing. Is there really such thing as privacy in a relationship? And if there is, what happens when that person dies and you realize that there are certain things that no one has ever witnessed but your partner or your lover and what do you do what the person who witnessed those things is gone?
I have this tendency to talk about my relationship as a way of processing my feelings and reactions. It isn’t a bad thing, but it scares my partner a little. He is a much more private person than I am and I am not only an open book, but I slip in a personalized audio book within that open book of me reading all of my inner thoughts out loud. I don’t have firm and hard and fast boundaries around stories and I tend to rely on all my close friends as sounding boards. I guess I have approval issues too and I have a hard time trusting myself. I guess I feel scared when it comes to dealing with big things and I need a hundred different voices and opinions and thoughts and strategies to see me through.
A liaison with a lover is obviously a different kind of secret. It’s difficult to be loyal to more than one person at a time. There’s betrayal potential in all situations and within all relationships. Honesty is a key feature in relationships and as soon as you become secretive and begin seeing someone on the side, the betrayal has happened. In reality though, the betrayal started long ago. The betrayal started when the two primary partners stopped communicating and stopped sharing with each other. When they stopped relying on each other as their intimate secret keeper, storyteller, and support person. When they started reading their Ipad over dinner instead of talking about their day, or going to the gym just to get out of the house and away from the emptiness and isolation that comes with a couple who can’t talk to each other.
1. We planned a liaison, made it official. I’d tell my wife I was going to meet up with Stuart, she’d tell her girlfriend she had a graduate dinner to go to. Neither of our partners would be interested in those lies, they’d nod without even glancing away from the T.V. We were each so far apart from our partners that this rendezvous wasn’t even the beginning of the end. The beginning had come and gone long ago. We were so close to the end we could taste it.
2. This is the last time we’re going to meet. This sneaking around isn’t good for either of us. We can’t liaison every week like this without someone finding out and getting hurt.
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