Lesbian until Graduation is a term designated for that popular female trend of experimenting with lesbianism during college or University, even though you’re clearly heterosexual, and after graduation you’ll end up marrying some trucker named Steve, having five kids, and fetching him a few beers while he watches the game with all his drinking buddies.
But, during those pivotal college years, you’ll be making out with your girlfriends at the bar, doing body shots of each other’s tits, and getting high enough on E that you’ll end up either going down on your best friend, or receiving the best cunnilingus you’ve ever had from a girl you picked up at the gay as an “experiment.”
Of course, pre-graduation lesbians exist in many forms, not just the promiscuous bar slut who likes to fool around with girls from time to time because she’s either really horny, or trying to impress some dude. Another type is the political, left wing hippy lesbian. She’s the girl who enrolled in the International Development or Women’s Studies program, never got laid much in high school, and probably had one really douche, sexist boyfriend that she can’t let go. After getting inspired by her super hot, muff diving TA, she’ll end up going out for coffee with her and getting the idea in her head that she’s a lesbian. She’ll denounce men, receive a TON of oral sex, which she rarely reciprocates, and then finally meet a ‘nice guy’ and fall into heterosexual love all over again. In the true lesbian world, she’s nothing more than a Clit tease.
Another type of lesbian until graduation is the girl who just likes to party, with anyone, no matter what. These are girls who have pretty hardcore drug addictions, think that hedonism is a type of religion, and generally masturbate at least ten times a day. These girls may end up being a self-proclaimed bisexual after graduation, but in the meantime, they’re just girls who like to have fun and don’t appreciate labels of any kind.
A tip for the men out there: if you meet one of these girls, she is probably the only chance you’ll ever get to having a “two girls one guy” fantasy. So, if you see her flirting with another woman, get over there as fast as you can and try to seduce them both. If you win her over, then the odds in your favour, and she’ll do all the work trying to convince the other girl that tag teaming you is going to be fun.
1. My sister was a total lesbian until graduation. Now, she’s got five kids, shops at IKEA every Saturday, and is married to a Welder named Bruce. She hasn’t spoken to any of her friends from her Feminist Theory class in years.
2. Zoey always knew that Sarah was just a lesbian until graduation, but she still let herself get attached. When Sarah invited her to her wedding years later, Zoey sent her reply envelope to the groom and filled it with pubic hair clippings and a note that read “She used to be a Dyke,” written in menstrual blood.
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