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Fuck is a slang word that means have sex.
It is a wonderful word that, used properly, can spruce up any fucking sentence you can think of. In addition to being a verb, it can also be used as a noun, interjection, intransitive and transitive verb, adverb, and adjective. As the great George Carlin once put it, “Fuck the fucking fuckers.”
Fucking is great. It is one of the very basic and primal instincts that everyone on earth shares. We all want to fuck. Look around you. Every person you see wants to fuck. They might not want to fuck you, and you might not want to fuck them, but they want to fuck someone. Or something.
I once fucked a latex glove inside a rolled-up towel. Wasn’t proud of it, but I did it. Plus, when I was done, it was easy clean-up. Just threw away the glove. By the way, if you’re going to try this, I recommend adding a little lube to the inside of the glove before you start. Then close your eyes and think of fucking whomever you want.
In a lot of ways, fucking is very different than “making love”. The bride and groom make love on their honeymoon. You and the maid of honor fuck on the hotel roof. See the difference? Making love is about sharing a sensual experience with someone you care about and respect. Fucking is more about making a person scream as their brain melts with orgasmic bliss.
Fucking is great because it is a skill you can improve the more learn about it, and the more you do it. When I was a teenager having sex for the first time, I didn’t know what the fuck I was doing. Don’t get me wrong, it was still fantastic, but it was very basic. As I fucked more and more women, I learned different positions, techniques, rhythms, and kinky variations. One of the best things about having sex with different people is finding out their interesting fuck techniques and incorporating them into your repertoire.
If you really like to fuck a lot, start a band. Even if you only play now and then, you’ll get laid. Of course, I should suggest that you use protection if you’re going to fuck a lot of different people. But let’s face it: wearing condoms sucks. It’s like eating with a baggie over your tongue. You don’t starve, but you don’t taste.
1. “I love tit fucking. I love foot fucking. I love fucking mouths. I love fucking pussies. I love fucking assholes. I love to fuck! Jesus, I think the drugs are kicking in, guys.” – Dali Lama
2. Last year my sister told me that she caught our mom and dad having a fuck in the shower. She said mom was surprisingly limber, and that dad’s stamina was incredible. While I appreciated her honesty and openness, I haven’t been able to get an erection since.
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