Famine Underwear are the garments you wear during a shortage of underwear, when you haven’t done laundry in several weeks or months. We’ve all been there. Some of us wear bikini bottoms or gym shorts, some of us fasten together weird diaper-looking replacement underwear out of bandannas or old pillow cases, and some of us just give up all together and pull our skinny jeans over our bare asses and pussies and just pray that we don’t get our muffs caught in the zipper of said jeans.
Another trick is to turn ones underwear inside out and wear them again, but that’s always kind of grossed me out. I’m not going to feel clean if I shower and then step into a pair of panties with yesterday’s jizz on the other side of them. Also, the crotch of those skinny jeans is going to smell fishy and awkward and then everyone’s going to be wondering whose twat has gone off or who smells like runny cheese. I’m just not a fan.
I tend to do laundry obsessively, but when I find myself in a famine underwear situation, one thing I do in a pinch is hand wash a pair of undies and blow-dry them. I usually don’t have the time to dry them out completely, but if I can even just get them mostly dry so that they’re just a little bit moist and damp, at least they’ll probably dry okay and I’ll be clean. Of course, this makes my pussy all moist which turns me on which usually makes me have to pause whatever I’m in a rush to get done and rub one out, but that’s par for the course so I don’t worry too much. The thing is, sometimes I can’t even get them dry enough to be considered damp and they end up giving the ass of my jeans a dark wet imprint of my butt. Which I suppose is fine in the spring or fall, but less so in the summer when it’s hot and disgustingly humid and you just know your fucking ass isn’t going to dry all damn day, and winter where you spend twenty minutes heating up your car engine and by the time you arrive at work you can’t get out of the car because your ass is frozen to the seat.
A friend of mine recently had a one-night-stand with a dude that she met up with for coffee. They had fucked before but she really didn’t think they’d be fucking again because he had a girlfriend and it was laundry day so she just wore the same underwear for the date that she had worn the day before. She ended up doing the walk of shame in underwear she had been wearing for over forty-eight hours.
1. My famine underwear is one of those pull-up diapers. I stole a whole bunch of them from the family that I baby-sit for.
2. When all my laundry’s dirty I just don’t leave the house. You could say my famine underwear is my bed.
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