An ex with benefits is an ex that you continue to fuck after having broken up with that person. It’s two individuals continuing a sexual relationship without continuing their regular relationship. Kind of like friends with benefits except the whole ex with benefits thing is usually a lot more emotionally charged because you have the relationship history to contend with. I’m not entirely sure how two people fuck after having broken up and get some benefit out of it. Or maybe it’s just that I’m not sure how the benefit outweighs the intense anguish, but I think that’s because I’ve usually been the one to be broken up with.
In my experience, exes don’t usually want to continue fucking. They’d rather find someone to be friends with benefits, but I do have a few friends who continue to fuck their ex and it seems to work for them. I mean, it’s not that their lives are moving forward necessarily, but at least they’re getting laid. Some people have much better sex with their ex after they’ve broken up with them. Perhaps the pressure and the expectations of a particular sex life have been lifted and they can just enjoy themselves and not worry too much about what it all means or whether they’re going to have to settle for a particular kind of sex for the rest of their lives.
I think the scariest thing about commitment is the idea that we’re going to have to deal with the same issues over and over again. Let’s say you do have a less than awesome sex life with your partner. Say you have inhibitions or he does or she does or you have a low sex drive and your partner doesn’t or vice versa. Or say you’re just into different things and you have different kinks and neither of you are quite willing to bend to accommodate the other. Like, this is why you should probably fuck as often as you can before you make a long-term commitment with the person you’re with. You’re going to want to find out how you mesh in the sack. And the sex that you have will have a big impact on the kind of relationship you end up with. It’s not the only thing that matters, but it’s definitely one of the big things.
If you aren’t having great sex with the person you’re with you’re way more likely to get back into an ‘ex with benefits’ type of situation. And not that sex with your current partner has to be amazing all the time, there should be a certain amount of consistency with it. In other words, communicate and fuck as much as you possibly can.
1. My ex and I have a situation. We’re exes with benefits, so to speak. If she’s not with someone and I’m not, we meet up, drink some wine, eat some sushi, eat each other, and go home. It’s a sweet arrangement.
2. I love sex with my ex. It’s way better than when we were together. This ex with benefits deal is awesome.
RELATED TERMS: