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E-Coli Pie refers to analingus in porn. Analingus, of course, is when a person gets their asshole licked, tongue-fucked, and kissed by someone else. Or themselves, I suppose, if they’re flexible enough. Say, that’s not a bad idea. Hang on – I want to try something.
Nope. Can’t analingle myself. I think I pulled a few back muscles trying. Be careful out there, kids! Limber up before you try to tongue-fuck your own crust cave.
E-Coli is a bacteria found in the poop particles in your crap and asshole. If you get that bacteria in your mouth while you’re giving someone analingus, it could mean you’ll get some terrible food poisoning symptoms. I don’t think they’re fatal, but they do cramp your style…and your stomach. So, the best thing to do if you’re going to give someone analingus, is either use a dental dam, or get them to have a thorough enema beforehand. The enema isn’t 100% effective, but it does decrease the amount of shit particles up the poop chute.
I used to be totally against giving analingus to my lady friends. Oh, I’d let them do it to me all night long, but I wouldn’t let them kiss me afterwards. Not unless they brushed their teeth, rinsed with mouthwash, ate a peanut butter sandwich, drank two beers, and then brushed their teeth again. But nowadays, when I’ve got my special lady friend bent over in doggy style position and I’m giving her some serious pussy munching from behind, that little brown button calls to me.
It says (in Jennifer Tilly’s voice), “Give me a kiss, big boy. It will drive her wild. We took a shower earlier. It’s clean. Come and get it, Tiger.”
I love it when it calls me Tiger. So, lately, I’ve been eating some E-Coli Pie. And, you better believe that my special lady friend goes wild for it. What she likes most is when she’s bent over in doggy style position and I’m finger fucking her pussy, stimulating her G-Spot from behind while giving her analingus. She squirts all over the place. And, so far, no problems from errant shit particles.
God I love a woman’s asshole. I love to finger it. I love to tongue it. I love to fuck it. As far as holes go, it’s definitely top five for me. Here’s my all-time top five holes:
1. Pussy
2. Grand Canyon
3. Asshole
4. Mouth
5. Donut
Speaking of, I’m going to get a dozen. Peace out!
1. Larry has never given his wife analingus, but on their anniversary he thought he’d do something special for her. He ate a big slice of E-Coli Pie, and she made noises he had never heard before.
2. Rachel and her lesbian lover Dee-Dee were locked in a serious sixty-nine on the couch. Suddenly, Dee-Dee stuck the tip of her long tongue into Rachel’s asshole. Dee-Dee munched away on Rachel’s E-Coli Pie for a solid ten minutes, during which, Rachel had three orgasms.
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