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A Drag Queen is a male performer whose profession consists of dressing, dancing and singing like a woman and to a lesser extent, being fabulous.
I always thought that my friend Stacey, who is always a big depressing drag, should be referred to as the Drag Queen. I swear, that chick hasn’t been in a positive mood since her whole family was slaughtered by masked intruders. Jesus, Stacey, it was two months ago. Let it go! She won’t even laugh when we’re watching ‘Two and a Half Men’. Actually, that makes sense. That show sucks without Charlie.
It should be noted that not all drag queens are gay. Men with every sexuality under the sun perform as drag queens. Most comedy troupes use men dressed up as women as a staple in their repertoire. There’s just something funny about a guy with a big moustache dressed up like Little Bo Peep. I’m not sure why.
Drag queens have been brought into the mainstream through such movies as “Pricilla, Queen of the Desert”, “The Birdcage”, and “White Chicks”. In “White Chicks”, two black FBI agents dress up inside a couple of white women-suits to try to solve a case. Hilarity ensues, as you can imagine. Of course, it’s not the first time two black guys have been inside a white woman. God bless interracial threesomes. She’ll never go back. And, she’ll walk funny for a month.
If you want to see a lot of drag queens, you can find them acting fabulously at gay pride parades, drag clubs, discos and cabarets. They’ll probably be lip-synching to something by Madonna or Tina Turner. They will have more sequins on their dress than you’ve ever seen before. Feel free to wear sunglasses – the glare off some of those dresses is like the god dam sun!
Drag queens can also be known as transvestites or female impersonators. I guess the most famous of these is Dame Edna. She’s the character created and performed by Barry Humphreys. Despite how hideous she is, she’s actually very funny. He’s been doing that character since 1956, so my guess is that he’s probably got more fancy panties in his dresser than regular guy underwear.
1. Pete was embarrassed about his moonlighting job as a drag queen. He thought if all his football buddies found out about it, they’d think he was gay and ostracize him. They did find out, and they did ostrich-size him. The literally dragged him to the zoo, and shoved an ostrich head up his asshole. Pete didn’t mind too much – his wife had been pegging him for years. But he felt bad for the ostrich.
2. Jack was working as a drag queen in a hugely successful cabaret for over twenty years. He had made enough money to retire, so he wanted to try something he had always dreamed about. He started illegal street racing. After he had suped-up his Honda, it wasn’t long before he couldn’t be beat in a drag race. He was the Drag Queen again!
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