A thin sheath of latex rubber worn over the penis as a method of birth control and to protect against sexually transmitted diseases.

In the 1980s a “female condom” was introduced that is designed to be worn inside the vagina instead of over the penis. These proved to be just as effective as conventional condoms, but not as popular. They also look ridiculous.

Sometimes you see condoms in the store that are made of sheep’s intestines instead of rubber, and that’s just fucking gross.

Many men claim to dislike wearing condoms because they say it reduces the sensitivity of the penis. This might be true, and while barebacking a nubile beauty might be one the life’s great pleasures, we urge you to take caution. A moment of pleasure is probably not worth the risk of HIV infection, being deformed by tertiary syphilis, or walking through a supermarket with screaming four-year-old.

1. I couldn’t find a condom, so Claire and I just dry-humped old school like a couple of teenagers.

2. The worst thing about a condom is when you go to roll one on and it’s facing the wrong way, and you get stretched halfway down your cock before you realize it. A total boner-killer.

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Birth Control