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Bigamy (verb) – The practice of having more than one spouse. While illegal in some jurisdictions, it is traditional in others. Personally, I don’t see the purpose of having even one wife, unless she let’s you swing. Making a man choose one vagina for the rest of his life is like limiting him to seeing only one sunrise for his whole life. I’d rather watch each unique sunrise every morning, and admire the shit out of its beautiful ass, if you understand my meaning.
Bigamy is illegal in almost all of the Western Hemisphere (except in a few pockets in Utah and Alberta). It is punishable (as though marriage isn’t punishment enough) by fines and imprisonment. If I had ten wives, I’d consider imprisonment a welcome escape. Put me away for life, Judge. I’d enjoy the peace and quiet.
On the other hand, most Muslim and African countries allow polygamy (more than one wife). In countries such as Egypt, Iran, and Saudi Arabia, for example, dudes are allowed to have up to four wives. If I had to get married, I’d definitely go for the full four-pack. I’d choose four very different women that would all comprise everything I’d want in my life. Here’s a brief breakdown:
Wife #1
Ethnicity: Canadian
Hair: Red (Strawberry Blonde, shoulder length)
Tits: Full C-Cup
Height/Age/Weight: 5’3/18/105
Specialties: Deepthroating, Baking, Scoring Club Drugs
She’d be the youngest and cutest of the wives. Her nipples would be perfect.
Wife #2
Ethnicity: African-American
Hair: Brown (Chestnut, past the shoulders)
Tits: Full B-Cup
Height/Age/Weight: 5’7/29/115
Specialties: Kabbazah Sex, Cooking, Dominatrix Work
She’d be the African-American MILF of the wives, and would teach the other three about Kabbazah. Look up Kabbazah sex if you don’t know what it is here on Dickipedia.
Wife #3
Ethnicity: Scandinavian
Hair: Blonde (Natural blonde, shoulder-length)
Tits: Double D
Height/Age/Weight: 5’9/21/125
Specialties: Tit Fucking, Swallowing, Grand Theft Auto
She’d be the bombshell of the wives, the one I’d take to show off at reunions. Actually, fuck that – I’d bring all four to the reunion. Now who’s the prom king, bitches?
Wife #4
Ethnicity: Asian
Hair: Black (Short bob-cut)
Tits: A-Cup
Height/Age/Weight: 5’0/22/95
Specialties: Anal Sex, Fexibility, Housekeeping, Paying Bills
A light-weight, short, Asian beauty that is always dressed like a school girl and loves to give up the anus. Saturdays would be just for her.
Yep. That’s the way I’d set it up if I had my druthers.
Back to bigamy. I guess I can understand why some men want to try to get away with bigamy. To go through the bullshit of divorce is always painful. Plus, you have to give up half your stuff and pay alimony. By just taking off or secretly marrying someone else, you don’t have to go through any of that bullshit. It sucks when you get caught, but then, so does having extra-marital affairs, and we’re not going to stop having those, are we guys?
1. Jack married Janet and Chrissy and was guilty of bigamy.
2. Fuck bigamy. Just be a playa.
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