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A baby daddy is the father of your child whom you did not marry and with whom you are not currently involved. So, sort of like a sperm donor except you probably knew him a little bit and maybe even dated him for awhile, but the second he found out you were pregnant he split. And he doesn’t send you child support or visit you or your baby or want to get to know his child at all. And you have sole custody and he didn’t try to fight you for it and maybe, in the future, on your child’s birthday that baby daddy will send a retarded hallmark greeting card and he won’t write any kind of personal note on it he’ll just write ‘love daddy’, or ‘love your father’ or, and this is the worst, ‘from Fred’ (and hopefully Fred is actually his name, but even if it is it’s just horrifying that he’s sending you this humiliating birthday card and not even acknowledging that he’s your father).
There are lots of references to baby daddy’s on movies that focus on ghettos and gangs and tough brotha’s living on the street. There’s totally a baby daddy in the movie Save The Last Dance and he’s super hot and he still likes to see the mother of his child at the bar and dance with her and have her nice big sexy ass grinding up into his groin, but when it comes to taking his son to the park for a few hours so that the mom can get her homework done, he is just way too immature and impatient for that. He’s not good with babies, didn’t want to be a daddy at sixteen, but she probably didn’t want to be a mama at sixteen either, so they probably both should’ve used fucking condoms if they were going to get all up in each other’s junk.
When I was younger I used to dream of being a single parent. I wanted a baby so bad but there wasn’t anyone in the picture to parent with me and I kind of just wanted to go get knocked up and not tell the dude (and hopefully not know his name or ever see him again), and call up my mom one day and be all ‘oops, I got knocked up’ and because I was so young she’d cry a bit, but then get super excited to be an Oma and start buying me things and helping me hire a midwife and invite me to come stay with her once the baby was born so she could help take care of it but I would still get all the credit as the amazing single mom I would be.
It’s probably for the best that I never did get pregnant, no matter how many times I ‘forgot’ to take my birth control pill.
1. My baby daddy is a drug-dealing loser. His only good quality is his huge cock.
2. That man is totally a baby daddy to, like, fifty illegitimate children.
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