Having no sexual feeling. Seemingly without sex drive. Boring as fuck, or “no fuck”, as the case may be. One study suggests as much as 1% of the population may be asexual. Frankly, this sounds like complete bullshit to us because we’re pretty much horny all day long. But Gary in accounting, who has been married to his wife Barb for sixteen years, assures us that it’s totally possible for someone to lack a sex drive. There’s a trade off, though, says Gary. Barb makes the best ambrosia salad he’s ever tasted. Oh really? We’re starting to wonder if that “Just Shoot Me” T-shirt Gary wore to the company picnic wasn’t some kind of cry for help.

1. Don’t go out with Tracy. That chick is completely asexual.

2. Being asexual means Carmella has plenty of time to tend to her backyard organic garlic garden.

RELATED TERMS:

Anorgasmic

Horndog