An amateur is a non-professional porn performer. So not an actual porn star, but perhaps a star in their own mind.
If I knew for sure that no one would be able to recognize me, I’d do some amateur porn. I’d rig up my bedroom all crazy with hula hoops and fire pits and chains and hooks from the ceiling and I’d build a pie throwing room in my basement made of tile with a drain in the middle of the floor and a sprinkler and hose system built in so that once all the pies have been thrown and we’ve finished having crazy wild pie sex on the tiled floor, we could just turn on the cleaning system, leave the room and lock the door and it would be all self-cleaning, kind of like a giant dishwasher, all sparkly clean by the next morning.
I’d make sure my body was all glistened up with oil and glitter and I’d own all kinds of high heels and platform heels and multiple pairs of coloured fishnets and I’d walk around wearing a lot of leather and whipping things.
And sometimes the scenes would be all loving and pretty and all close up and grey scale, except sometimes it would turn into a Blair Witch kind of porn which isn’t really what I’m into but that’s kind of what most amateur porn ends up looking like so I suppose it’s bound to happen, even to the best of us amateurs. I’d probably aim to set up a whole bunch of cameras at different angles and with different zooms so that we could edit things together and get some close-up shots along with the wide angles.
It’s the performance aspect that draws me in. I always wished I’d joined the theatre club in high school, that I had tried out for some of the plays or even taken community theatre. I never gave myself the chance to try it out, I was always too chicken or too shy or not confident enough. I was kind of awkward about how I looked and whether or not I was cool enough, not realizing that no one is cool, ever, and those people who are don’t know it and those people who are and DO know it, lose their coolness pretty quickly and start working retail right out of high school and end up managing the photo lab at the shoppers drug mart in their thirties and forties.
1. I love watching amateur porn. The people always look super 80s, like watching Degrassi, The Grown Up Years, or something. Their bodies are always kind of pimply or chunky or boney and they don’t really make the same noises that regular porn stars do, the guys tend to just grunt a lot and the girls just turn into mouth breathers.
2. I know I’m not a porn star yet, but I’ve been doing amateur porn since I was twenty-one and I know I have star potential. I mean, I’m only seventy-one.
RELATED TERMS: