There was a time, long ago that no man had free porn in any form. No magazines, no celebrity sex tape dvds, not even a playboy. You would think that primitive men would be getting turned on by the wind, with all that bottled up sexual energy. So, did we have other ways of satisfying our urge to orgasm?

Men tend to assume that an orgasm consists of draining the main vein, however we tend to find similar enjoyment in other activities that might give us some answers to why we get such a hard on for things that do not include women. We tend to include sexy ladies wherever we can, but when it comes down to it, guys tend to watch a lot of guys do things for most entertainment.

Through history, man has tried to prove who had the biggest dick in different ways, some more ridiculous then others. Lets take a look at some of the various alternatives to watching porn stars get fucked that got us off.

War

Men have a long history with war. There are many different reasons, but there’s a stigma that we are simply fighting each other to prove which ruler has a bigger dick. It could be religious, political, economic or for the fuck of it. Most wars capitalized on the fact that men like to fight, and the idea of watching Saving Private Ryan in 3D on the Imax would most likely make any man jizz in his pants.

Sports

Nothing gets a guy more pumped up than watching his favorite football team (in tight spandex pants) crush their opponents and do the touchdown dance. You’ll probably see some of the most testosterone fueled men orgasm at every hit, and nearly shit themselves when the teams are deadlocked in the last minute. It could be modern man’s attempt to fuel his bloodsport desires, or another aspect to prove who’s the bigger man. One thing is for sure, most guys get more jazzed up over their favorite football stars then fucking a sexy slut.

Fights

It seems like we human beings have a history of violence because we cant occupy ourselves with anything that doesn’t involve semi naked, sweaty men, grappling each other. One of the greatest sports phenomena that has pushed entertainment out of the norm, is UFC. You can’t help but hear tight wearing steroid using douches doing a circle jerk over their favorite fighter. What heterosexual male wouldn’t get turned on by seeing buff naked dudes stick their junk in each others faces and smelling the hot stank of waxed assholes. It’s for aerodynamics of course – they’re professionals.