1. “I Love You.” Mind you, it was a one night stand.

2. “I want to lick your armpit.”

3. There was this one guy would couldn’t get off without stringing together a whole bunch of foul words that made no sense as a sentence; “fuck, whore, asshole, bitch, cunt, pussy!” So odd.

4. One guy begged me to slap his erect dick.

5. “You’re the first biological woman I’ve had sex with in a long time…”

6. “My last girlfriend had a really wicked body.”

7. “Your ass tastes like caramel.”

8. “I’m sorry…I don’t always cry like this.”

9. “Can I cut you?”

10. “I just want to make you cum Jenny!” Too bad my name is Brittany.

11. “Call me daddy.”

12. “Wow, you’re just like a man in bed.”

13. “Don’t worry my mom has heard me have sex before.”

14. I met this guy on an online dating site and we had only e-mailed back and fourth a couple times before meeting up and having sex. He couldn’t stop saying, “I’m a stranger. You don’t know me, I’m a stranger, you don’t know me,” over and over again.

15. “Could you wash this?” And then handed me a used butt plug.

16. “You’re not pulling my balls hard enough.”

17. “So, have you ever seen ‘Two Girls: One Cup’?”

18. “Can I stick it in now?”

I always thought that the guys were the normal ones, but it turns out they’re not!

A couple weeks ago, one of my chick friends brought up a very interesting topic of conversation. She told me that she received a penis picture from a guy she’d been chatting with on an online dating site for a couple of weeks. Basically, she was completely shocked and a little bit disgusted that he would just send this to her out of the blue without her even asking for it.

She then went on to tell me that she forwarded the picture to a lot of her girlfriends and even asked if I wanted to see it. Of course I did cause I wanted to see if it was really something the cyber dude should be flaunting. Of course it wasn’t all that great so it made me think why he would do it in the first place.

A couple days later we all went out for some drinks after work and my friend with the penis picture proceeded to pass it around to about everyone in the bar. Happy hour got a lot happier as people were laughing hysterically at this poor guy’s dick!

I later went home to think. From a woman’s point of view, a man’s junk just isn’t all that enticing. Sure, it has a great purpose in theory, but just looking at it probably doesn’t do anything for them, and I can totally see why. Dicks have nothing in comparison to tits, and I’m saying this from a completely objective stand point.

So what can we learn from Brett Favre and the cyber dude? Next time you think it is a good idea to send a picture of your dick to some chick, be prepared to have it shown to just about everyone in her group of friends and possibly the news, the local newspaper, and blasted all over the internet. You’ll be a porn star, only laughed at. So, my best advice for you is to not even get yourself involved in sexting, even if you trust the person. Unless you don’t give a fuck who is looking at your dick and scrutinizing every inch of it, then all the power to you!

The largest percentage polled reported that they watch porn a couple of times a week. When asked which type of media they use, 55% said they actually still watch porn on DVD via their computer, however, 51% reported that they also watch it online for free. Way down the list were cable television channels (20%), DVD on the computer (15%) and pay-to-download online (12%).

Most subjects (48%) said they pick what they are going to watch according to favorite content or style, while 32% said they choose it because of the performer. Further down the list of viewing criteria was purchase price (17%) and favorite production company (4%).

Not surprisingly, over 80% of respondents said they enjoyed watching porn with a partner.

In “Jesse Jane Online” (Digital Playground), Jesse Jane gets fucked by three guys (see, online dating does work!).

The three lucky bastards by the way: Scott Nails, Ben English, and Mick Blue.

“Online” also stars Shawna Lenee, who discovers the joys of getting laid through online dating after meeting Tommy Gunn. Additionally, Madelyn Marie makes an appearance with her fellow NSA partner, Danny Mountain.

Famed porn director Robby D took the helms on the project, and Jesse Jane was his first choice for the lead. She agreed to the project after her agent faxed the script over to her – one page at a time – and got hooked within the first ten pages.

“Jesse Jane Online” was set for release on November 11^th.