In a recent Men’s Health article Mark Wahlberg happened to mention that he doesn’t touch his own funky bunch. Yeah right. Bud, we had a hard enough time believing that you’re taller then 5’8 in The Fighter, why would we believe that you don’t choke your own chicken? Everybody does it, even if it’s just once a month. How can the guy who gave us 1991′s smash hit “Good Vibrations” not give himself any good vibrations? Should he get off his high horse and want to get off, Orgasm.com would like to give Dirk Diggler some fodder he can use to stimulate his Staff Sergeant Dignan. Okay, we were really reaching with that last one. Hopefully you can forgive us after the jump.

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