The story goes that Antone studied the schedules of homeowners in his neighborhood and, once he’d established their routines, he’d break in, masturbate to porn on their computers, and leave. One woman is even reported to have caught him in the act. She came home to find lube, towels and a cell phone by her computer which was playing porn. Antone allegedly threatened the woman’s life, grabbed the phone and lube, and fled her home.

Antone Owens is reported as having admitted to a porn addiction. He was caught when he gave a voluntary DNA sample that matched material left at the scene of one of the break ins. While we’re obviously big fans of Internet porn, we do always recommend that you watch porn from the privacy of your own home…not your neighbor’s. In fact, this may just be our most highly recommended way to watch porn.

Accounts say that Brad Armstrong and porn star girlfriend Jessica Drake helped Octomom get in the mood by showing her some porn. She clearly enjoyed it.

Octomom then tried on a variety of different outfits and, reportedly, got some great advice from Jessica Drake. Speaking of the shoot, Nadya said, “I owe a lot to Wicked Pictures contract star Jessica Drake; she opened my eyes to a whole different world of self-pleasure that I could have never imagined.”

Of course, the shoot comes just days after Nadya filed for bankruptcy who says that “the only dream I have is to buy a safe home for my family” when asked about plans for the money.

EDIT: We’re really sorry we made you look at all those pictures of Octomom. Here, have a look at Jessica Drake instead. You’ve earned it. Feel free to forget all about Octomom from now on. That is, until the next trainwreck.

Before she gets into the world of masturbation style sex movies, Nadya Sulemon will take your calls. The Examiner and TMZ report that the Octocrazy is now working for Dial-A-Star, a phone chat line that lets regular people like us call “celebrities”. Seriously. This exists. For $14/minute you can call future masturbation porn star, Octomom and have a conversation. This is where we are as a society. Oh and the other “celebrities” you can speak with? Brace yourselves: Dina and Michael Lohan, Loredana Jolie and AJ Benza. If you have any idea who Loredana Jolie and AJ Benza are please contact us at Orgasm.

Howard Stern, yes, he’s still around, recently spoke with the Octomental and asked her if she’d consider doing sex movies. She said she’d only do masturbation clips because she finds regular porn to be degrading. Riiiiiiight. Tell that to Ashley Sage or Judy Star or Monica Sweet or any of the many other talented adult entertainers who have educated our minds and dicks with their contribution to society. What are you contributing to society besides a pair of saggy tits and 14 offspring?

At Orgasm, we get that you have 14 mouths to feed but you can’t really be picky about how you feed them. Octonut, you’re now working as a prostitute. You may not be talking dirty to the people who are calling in to talk to a “celebrity” but you’re still selling yourself. If you want your kids to have more than one oreo cookie that they have to split for dinner, then maybe you should consider making a porn, be it masturbation or otherwise. Not that I want to see that…

No pics of Octogross in this post. At Orgasm, we always go for class rather than jackass, so I figured pics of hot chicks playing DJ Diddles was the better choice. You’re welcome, America.

We all have different tastes, but let’s agree that Nautica Thorn is gorgeous and we should all spank the shit out of our dicks to her XXX clips. If you squint, she kind of looks like your wife Rhea Durham. Just kidding. No one thinks about their wife when they masturbate. Unless you’re married to Nautica Thorn, in which case, we hate you.

Are you a member of the clergy Marky Mark? No? Good. You must like girl on girl stuff. If not you should really get into it. It can be sensual like the pic below of these two babes kissing or it can be raw like Marty with a huge dildo. Why do we get so turned on by two or more women getting their jollies? There’s probably some scientific/psychological explanation, but screw it. It’s hot!

If your dick’s not in your hand right now, you’re made of stone. Sorry, that was rude. Maybe you need something tangible to help you enjoy your own company like masterbilia for masturbation, something that you have in your possession that reminds you of a sexy time you had or wanted to have. An ex-girlfriends bra, a signed Red Sox baseball (you Bostonians and your Red Sox!), one of the costumes from the Planet of the Apes remake – whatever turns you on.

If what we’ve presented above isn’t enough to make your want to spend the rest of the day in full masturbation mode we’ve got just the ticket: The Dildo Monster. It’s a bizarre little XXX film, but you made I Heart Huckabees so you must be into some “interesting” cinema. Enjoy!

Some people love to garden in their spare time. Others like to go for a run, a bike ride, a jog, a hike or a walk in the woods to enjoy the fresh air and a bit of nature. Still others love to fish, to scuba dive, to golf or to water ski. Everyone among us seems to be able to find something to do to relax and refresh ourselves in our sometimes very limited leisure time, even if it is just curling up on our sofa with a good book or a favorite movie on the television.

Other people among us are more sexual in our natures, and we love to go online and check out all of the free porn sites that are available to us with just the click of our mouse. We can not believe how many sites we can access within a matter of minutes, or even seconds, and just how much free content there is floating around out there on the Internet that is just waiting for us to discover it and enjoy it. So yes, some of the more adventurous among us probably indulge in this bit of fun on a regular basis, and we find it to be a lot more fun than knitting.

As Woody Allen says in one of his movies when his wife accuses him of excessive masturbation, hey don’t knock my hobbies.

Yes, that’s porn!

Sure, personals are a call-to-action, and yes people truly are logging-on to Facebook because they do care what their family members are up to, but across single networking portals as much as on sites where one can actually stream a dirty movie, we are immersed in porn-a lot of time of our own making-all the time we are online and usually it is the only reason we are online.

It’s no surprise we love the web as we do. Where else could you get every need met as quickly and do it all in the privacy of your own home? Complete and immediate satisfaction is really what we get from a porn movie, the masturbation of both mind and pink parts, a warm wash of satiation from something we can simply lock our minds around and throw away the key for as long as we stay there.,

This complete submission to the P.C. screen we saw with T.V. , we are just at it again but now we can get so much more bang-for-our-buck in cyberspace.

Information flies at us on the web it’s no wonder we are willingly drowning in it, with no at us with no compunction or compromise. We love our porn and we love the stuff that is now passing as our porn, stuff that entices and arouses us just as much as a movie of two people fucking. Here we are and here we’ll stay, happy with whatever kind of porn we make ourselves these days just as long as we can keep making it.

Nothing has been questioned more by women regarding men’s sexuality than masturbation. Some men deny it, others proudly proclaim that they jack off multiple times a day. This isn’t anything new to most educated women, but what many want to know are about the existence of circle jerk parties.

This is the act of several men getting together with the intention of watching porn, stripping off their clothes and getting off to the point of ejaculation only to consider doing it again. Not limited to younger men, groups will form with the overall purpose of sexual enjoyment. The practice is often started by younger men in their pubescent years and holds a rather competitive edge to it. The idea is that the first one to get off is the winner. Often they’ll either stimulate themselves or help others get off as they get older. The circle jerk for some is an introduction to sexuality with other males. As men grow older and discover their sexual turn on’s, some realize that they enjoy the company of other males as an added component to their sexual exploration that may lead to swinging or wife swapping.

There is even a dirty joke told amongst adolescent youth involving all of the participants of a circle jerk to ejaculate on a saltine cracker with the last person to come being the lucky recipient of eating the cracker. This practice leans towards cum-play for some, and for others a deeper interest in bisexuality.

Among the older participants in a circle jerk or group masturbation scene, many will engage in oral sex after their inhibitions are loosened. Sometimes drugs can be involved as with the addition of alcohol. Any discomfort about sexual preference tends to disappear once the pornography starts. Some have speculated that for teenage boys, a circle jerk session is about establishing dominance and male sexuality.

This practice is one women rarely engage in, preferring their masturbation solo or if with another girl, usually just one other and usually couched in close rubbing and giggling or the cliché slumber party pillow fight.

The mental connection between dressing sexy and feeling sexy has been established by psychologists and doctors in the study of human sexuality.

Many a cross-dresser will spend the time to throw on thigh highs, favorite g-string or boyshort panties and a cute top all just for the sake of fantasy and pleasing myself. Sure it takes a few more moments to get ready for something that normally happens in the nude.

From a mental perspective, the feel of those clothes serves as a reminder that we’re doing something special, often for someone else. But why not do something special for ourselves? Why not take the time to treat our bodies as the loving temples of sex we are?

For many, normal masturbation can quickly grow into a routine. This is why erotic fantasies phone sex and other trends in sexual entertainment are so popular. Yet they tend to be expensive and near addiction status for many which can be a danger. Instead of starting immediately with the mundane and routine, we can now engage in our secret, sacred sexuality without fear of being caught. If a partner is inclined to join in the fun, all the better. The various types of clothing worn for lingerie serve a purpose and that sole purpose is to remind humanity of its sexuality.

Masturbation is healthy for us and if we’ve dedicated the entire month of May to it, why not spice things up by putting on our sexy lingerie that we spent good money on while we play just for ourselves? There is even an entire month dedicated to Masturbation! Why not spice it up with lingerie?

The clothes are great inspiration for writing too! And as an erotic romance author they’re a tax write off for research purposes.

If clothes make the man, then lingerie can be the icing on the cake of a great sexual experience starting from the inside out; even if that experience only involves the solo explorations of those insides and outs.

They are designed to allow men to urinate and wash without removing them. Most often they are locked and the dominant has control of the key. While a male chastity device is effective in preventing men from masturbating and having sex, most dominant females would agree that a good submissive shouldn’t require such measures and should willingly abide by the orders of his Domme when it comes to masturbation, sex and orgasms. They can be very useful items for training purposes with an inexperienced submissive though, and they are wonderful for use as a means of prolonged play because they will constantly remind the submissive that he is owned and that even his most natural and uncontrollable urges can be controlled by the woman who owns him.

Some male submissives enjoy being denied the ability and opportunity to orgasm, and they really enjoy the idea that their orgasms are a gift from their Domme and given only when she sees fit. They crave the denial and the discomfort that the chastity device provides. They enjoy being made to beg for release. The Dommes usually enjoy being able to tease the submissive by getting them aroused and they enjoy the discomfort that their sub experiences when his cock begins to get hard inside the device. Even when the sub isn’t in their physical presence, the Domme can tease from afar with a phone call, e-mail or text message. It’s a great way to remind the sub of their role in the relationship. For men who enjoy this type of play, being able to experience this for days, or even weeks, is very enjoyable to them even when it is extremely uncomfortable.

But fear rarely deters an action. It just makes it harder to accomplish and adds an element of excitement. Recently Abstinence clubs for teens have begun to spring up. These clubs are suppose to preach the goodness of waiting. They do not talk about what the obligations are for those entering into a sexual relationship. They don’t give options of birth control or masturbation techniques. They feel that birth control Is not something that will stop the rise of unwed mothers on the society welfare lines and that learning about masturbation should be left to watching internet porn. The topic if talked about it all should be regulated to gym locker rooms and hopefully it might be something parents may discuss with tier children. But there are no classes for parents outlining how to have the talk. In fact few adults actually had the talk from their own parents so the belief that they have anything to share or can pass on is not there.

Truly if the government, parents and religious institutions want to stem the tide they need to agree what the objective is and how to get kids to listen. Any parent will tell you threatening a child with punishment of things that might happen is not effective. It quickly goes in one ear and out the other.