Posts Tagged ‘Free Porn’

The Top Ten Sex Trends Of The Decade

Wednesday, December 22nd, 2010

The first decade of the new millennium will definitely be remembered for one thing…SEX! Yes folks, this was the most sexual decade of them all and sex hasn’t captured this many headlines in the history of man kind. Here is a look at the top 10 sex trends of the last decade.

The Celebrity Sex Tape:
It is the trend that wouldn’t die and the one question asked during the end of this decade remained: were there any celebrities out there who didn’t have a sex tape that was like free porn? Once upon a time, hollywood celebs were a breed of elites, but they’ve proved otherwise in this decade and showed their ugly side, not too mention, their front side, back side and a lot more than that!

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Threesomes:
Once the millennium turned, someone decided that sex between just two people wasn’t enough. We’ve seen celebs hop on the menage a trios band wagon and you couldn’t turn on the TV without seeing two girls and one guy.

Turning Lesbian:
In the last decade there has been an abundance of woman turning gay. But no one will ever know if they’re truly gay, or just curious. College girls were making out with their BFFs, the “L Word” made the lifestyle seem fabulous, and Megan Fox and Amanda Seyfried made a lesbian experience seem fantastic!

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Sex Toys:
The last decade is probably best known for spawning a $1 million, diamond encrusted vibrator. Adult sex toys were everywhere and the xxx accessories became novelties.

Political Scandals:
Clearly Clinton started this trend back in the 90′s but within the last decade is when political scandals really came to the surface.

Anal Sex:
Many years ago Eddie Murphy wrote a song which detailed all of the different things that you could put in a person’s butt. During this decade, people of all ages were putting dicks in butts and anal became the newest and best form of intercourse.

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Sexting:
Wikipedia defines sexting as “the act of sending sexually explicit messages or photos electronically, primarily between mobile phones,” a a poll also reveals that two thirds of you have once dirty texted.

Christmas Presents That Will Not Get You Laid

Tuesday, December 21st, 2010

They’re pulling out all the stops this year and there are some pretty outrageous christmas presents out there that wont do you any good! I don’t know about you, but I’m less concerned with family and turkey during Christmas, and a lot more focused on getting laid. So, if you feel the same type of Christmas spirit as I do, check out these Christmas gifts that WONT get you laid.

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Mistletoe Underwear
If you hear some bells ringing and you don’t know where it’s coming from, it could be from a dude wearing a mistletoe thong! Some guys are just doing it all wrong this season and wearing one of these things is a definite factor in not getting you any action this Christmas season.

The Cookie Sutra
The Karma Sutra book illustrated with cookies isn’t something that will necessarily get anyone one in the mood.

Babeland Blowjob Expert Kit
This is basically the equivalent of giving your girl a vacuum for Christmas, except for the fact that you want her to be the vacuum.

Candy Cane G String
The only thing that this Christmas present is going to do is creep everyone out.

Adult Mistletoe
This gift comes with the mistletoe and the condom. Just like the packaging says, “you never know what a kiss will lead to!”

“I’m a ho ho ho” T-shirt
I’m sure your girl will not appreciate you giving her a shirt that says she’s a ho.

Flashing Pecker Santa Hat
It’s the fastest way to spot a dick head, and therefore will not get you laid!

Lip Locked Lesbians Ornament
Two naked girls making out on a christmas ornament may not be the best way to inform your girl that you want her to have a three-some.

“Santa’s Little Slut” T-shirt
There is no woman out there who appreciates being called a slut, even the chicks on free porn don’t like it!

Sexy Penis and Boobie Stockings
Your girl wakes up to find a big, red fury dick and set of tits hanging by the fireplace with care. You’re not getting any action today.

So, take note guys, if you want your Christmas to be really special this year, do not buy any of these gifts!

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Small Vibes, –Great Pleasure

Tuesday, December 21st, 2010

102635They say great things come in small packages. Vibrators are no exception. Women’ crave all kinds of satisfaction (free porn included), and with a little exploration, a woman can find the right vibes to trip her trigger.

One of the more clever things to emerge in the sex toy industry is the practice of making vibrators that look like something else entirely. It doesn’t have to look like a big, vibrating wand or a big black cock. Some are made to look like hairbrushes or other common household items. A vibrator that looks and feels like a lipstick could be the perfect little travel toy. It’s pointed “lipstick” end can produce surprisingly strong vibrations. Angled the right way with consistent pressure, a stealthy woman can count on hot orgasmic waves, maybe even while taking a short break from her busy day at work.

Egg-shaped vibes are relatively small and also good for clit stimulation. With somewhat of a broader surface area, they can roll over the clit and give some very intense stimulation. If it is the type with a strong and reliable cord, it can be inserted into the vagina for internal vibrations as well. This type of model comes in an array of shapes besides the egg. The vibrating shape and its cord terminate with a handy speed control unit that a woman can experiment with or give over to her partner for some surprising sensations.

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Another development that is especially nice is the rise of vibrating toys in regular old drug stores. Sold as massagers, these fun things can look like small hand-held wands with round bulbs, giant jacks that look similar to non-vibrating professional massage tools, or a convenient array of other shapes. It is true that you could work on any of your tired muscles with these devices, but it seems that the advertising is done with a nudge and a wink. The companies are probably pretty sure which “muscle” might be getting the most intense workout.

If a woman prefers the feeling of insertion, there are still more vibes to be found. Penis-shaped vibrators don’t have to be huge. In fact, one can find them as small as that vibrating lipstick, and can move up in length and girth as desired.

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Naughty Board Games

Monday, December 20th, 2010

Sometimes, desperate times call for desperate measures and the only way of spicing up our sex lives – free porn aside – is through some good old-fashioned fun. That’s when board games come in. Not just intended for those with a penchant for Monopoly and Scrabble, these kinky titles are meant for two players only. Feel free to add more when swinging is an option.

Dec. 19 - Naughty Board Games

1. The Kama Sutra Game

Unsure of what to do on an average boring weeday night? Pull out this deck of Kama Sutra cards and get to playing! Containing everything from sharing sweet words to advanced sex positions, this game will not only keep you guessing; put it will provide you and your partner with a night to remember. Be sure to stretch!

2. Strip Chocolate Board Game

For those who like to bring something yummy to the bedroom, consider this Strip Chocolate game. The more clothes you take off, the more chocolate you can paint on yourself (and your partners body). And we all know how to get it off aftewards…wink, wink.

3. French Kiss Massage Kit and Game

Sold in four different versions – each with its own scent – this “game” comes with its own lotions and oils. Featuring everything from French Almond to Vanilla Orange lotion, all you have to do is spin the wheel and apply your product of choice to a designated part of the body. Though it’s safe to say that you’ll forget about the wheel shortly after, it’ll still serves as the most exciting foreplay you’ll ever have.

4. Speak Love, Make Love

Shaped like a classic board game, players give and receive as they move through the spaces. Similar to Monopoly, but instead of going to jail, you go ‘down’. Great for those who can’t make up their minds when sexual positions are concerned.

5. Fan The Flames

Ever had a sexual fantasy you were too scared of revealing? Then consider Fan the Flames. The game starts off with each player writting down their secret wish on a piece of paper, at the end of the game, your wish must be fullfilled. And if yours is too dirty, blame it on the game. Having kinky sex has never been this easy.

Caffeinated Loving: Porn Shunga Art As An Energy Drink

Friday, December 17th, 2010

Shunga is all about porn. Actually, when it comes down to it, Shunga means “Image of Spring” in Japanese, but essentially they are those highly erotic paintings that were made from the 16th to 18th centuries.

Okay, they might now be called erotica compared to some of the shit that we see in free porn, but they could actually get pretty explicit.

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So, just like Karma Sutra love oils, it was only a matter of time before they found a way to exploit this beautiful Japanese art into exotic products.

Shunga is a Canadian company who produces aphrodisiac oils, edible body powders, oils and creams for erotic massages, love enticing balm products, lube, and of course now, energy drinks!

Shunga has announced the creation of both a male and female sex drink, both which contain very different herbal extracts to enhance libido. Both drinks promise a whole lot, if you know what I mean. More than I thought any .75 ounce drink could ever do!

The woman’s version is supposed to increase sensitivity of the sexual region and strengthening of the vaginal wall, stimulate the central nervous system, control regulation of hormonal production and help to remove your inhibitions (nothing a little Tequila could’t do). So, basically, it makes you wild, tingly, full of hormones and strengthens your vaginal walls. Sounds like a magical drink to me!

The men’s version is supposed to help with erectile rigidity, give you a porn star style orgasm, improve hormonal levels and boost your sexual desire.

Now, you’re probably wondering if this shit even works? Well I’m going to tell you the honest truth, it doesn’t work very well, unfortunately.

A friend of mine tried out the women’s one and followed the directions on the bottle. Actually, she even double dosed herself and it had NO effect. As for me, I did as the directions said, and sadly I didn’t become a sex superhero. I told my lady friend that we should try it out and have sex with each other, but she wasn’t down for it, unfortunately.

As for the taste, don’t try it by itself. Mix it in with something else and it can be pretty tasty. As for the look, it comes in a little glass bottle and is labelled with some fancy traditional shunga art. It’s great to look at and tastes pretty good, but ultimately doesn’t work like it should.

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The Most Bizarre Dicks In History

Friday, December 17th, 2010

While penises can go anywhere from big and small to thick and thin, other’s are simply out of this world – and not just in free porn. Despite these carriers of unusual dicks being far and few, their stories are carried out in history like true legends of the past. Below, we’ll cover some of the most unusual dicks of all time. Brace yourselves, some of these gentlemen are packing a lot more than just your average rod.

Dec. 16 - The Most Bizarre Dicks In History

The Man With Double Dicks – No, I’m not making this up. Back in 1863, a man by the name of Juan Baptista dos Santos was born with two penises. But that’s not all. Suffering from diphallia, he also came equipped with three scrotums, and a third leg – which extended from the same area. In fact, his third leg had eight toes and two heels. Bringing a whole new meaning to the term “package”, Santos’ penises were also fully functional. He could pee from either and get double erections if necessary. How’s that for a visual?

The Ten Year Erection – Charles Chick Lennon, a 68 year-old man had a ten year-old erection after a penile implant surgery went terribly wrong. But that didn’t mean it was all fun, games and orgasms. Unable to do everyday activities such as riding a bike, wearing fitted trousers or swimming, Lennon became a recluse and eventually sued the doctor who messed up his penis. As a result, he won $400,000.

The Man Who Split His Penis In Two – Carl Carrol became something of a legend after infamously splitting his dick in two. And this was before the age of body modification. After being questioned over his outrageous act, he had this to say: “My decision to surgically remodel my genitals was deliberate, of deep satisfaction to me, highly exciting, sexually adventurous, and erotically exhilarating”. I guess there’s someone for everything.

The Penis Blob – Mark, a former male gigolo, found himself lacking in the girth department. His solution? Injecting saline into his penis and scrotum until he found himself with a 24 inch dong. He now refers to his dick as “The Blob”. I sense a horror/porno flick stemming out of this one.

Pickup Lines: Hip Hop Style

Thursday, December 16th, 2010

Although rappers and hip hop artists pride themselves in their ability to “fuck hoe’s and bitches”, I’d like to see how well they’d do in the real world. In fact, I’m sure that upon murmuring the first “hoe” out of their mouths, they’d be in for a slap on the face or a kick in the balls. But since they tend to treat their women likes the ladies in free porn, these “gangsters” are only scoring due to their popularity and hefty bank accounts. That’s right. I said it. Below, we’ll cover some of the most ridiculous pick-up lines in the world of rap and hip hop. While they may sound good alongside a catchy beat, applying them to reality will bring you nothing but harm.

Dec. 15 - Pickup Lines- Hip Hop Style

‘Baby Got Back’ by Sir Mix-A-Lot – While it would be next to impossible to find someone who can’t sing this entire song by heart, its lyrics certainly make us wonder why – and how – that is possible. Stating that his “anaconda don’t want none unless you’ve got buns, hun” is not only degrading to women, but quite cocky of him to say – pun totally intended. Sir Mix-A-Lot better be packing a lot of heat after making such a bold claim.

‘Back That Ass Up’ by Juvenille – I’ll start this one off by saying that nobody, under any circumstances, should ever use the following as a pick-up line: “Girl, you looks good, won’t you back that ass up? You’se a fine motherfucker, won’t you back that ass up?”. Not only will she tell you to work on your grammar but you’ll probably get a well-deserved beating.

‘Whisper’ by Yin Yang Twins – What is it about rappers and the female ass? In this instance, the Yin Yang twins made the object of their desire as clear as day with the line, “You got a sexy ass body and your ass look soft. Mind if I touch it and see if it’s soft? Naw, I’m jus plain’ less you say that I can”. Way to use the word “soft” twice, utilize poor grammar (what else is new?) and sound like a total pervert in the process. Bravo!

‘Fresh Pair of Panties On’ by Snoop Dog – Leave it up to the great ‘Snoop D.O. Double G’ to be as blunt as possible in his advances. Probably one of my favorite lines of all time, he goes on to say: “‘It’s time to slow it down, steadily grindin’ and this is, the big Doggy Dogg/And I ain’t talkin’ about no Air Force Ones/ I just gotta know, before you let me get some…Do you have a fresh pair of panties on?”. Ah yes, nothing like asking a stranger if she has “fresh panties” on. You’re the man, Snoop.

Online Flirting: It’s All About The Lips

Thursday, December 16th, 2010

Dec 15 orgasm.com1We all know that it’s incredibly easy for guys to fuck things up when they’re trying to flirt with girls. It actually takes a lot of brains to come up with the right lines and we’ve realized that the women we come into contact with are a lot harder to crack compared to the easy and cheesy lines that actually work when we watch the guys picking up the gals in free porn.

One of the most recent surveys conducted in the world of online dating and flirting has found that the absolute best internet chat up line for men to use is: “You have beautiful lips.”

According to the director of marketing from a predominant online dating service, he says, “we have found the Holy Grail of flirting.”

The research analyses the success rates of opening lines from about 200,000 online flirtations in 11 languages over the course of one month to come up with the “compliment success index.”

The users on the site were asked to use one of 12 different chat pick up lines. Each one complimented a part of a woman’s body or appearance, from her tits, to her hair.

The research measured the success rate of each line in two different ways: first, their success of creating any response at all; second, their success at launching a longer conversation. Which means one that goes back and forth at least four times- and that’s a lot for some of these poor bastards!

When it came down to it, complimenting a woman’s lips was the most successful overall. When it came to Dutch and Portuguese women, they mostly preferred: “you have beautiful ears”, that just goes to show how weird they are!

“What many women want is for men to take the initiative and not be wishy-washy. A lot of men on dating sites send a sort of generic message and women recognize something that hasn’t been customised for them.”

According to David Givens, the author of the book, “Love Signals: A Practical Guide to the Body Language of Courtship” said the results totally made sense because women tend to focus a lot of attention on their lips.

“From adolescence onwards, they cosmetically adorn their lips, applying lipstick and colors. They have been doing so since ancient Egypt.”

So guys, you want to get a date or you want to get fucked, you know what to say; anything that has to do with her lips should get you what you want!

Sex In Video Games

Wednesday, December 15th, 2010

Dec. 14 - Sex In Video GamesIt’s no news that sex and video games are now walking hand in hand. After all, what better way to attract young – and old – men then by combining gaming and sex in one lovely package?It eventually even leave free porn hanging on for dear life.

However, adding sex to play is no easy feat for video game developers. Often faced with the challenge of keeping things ‘kid-friendly’, many production companies now find themselves hovering over a thin line of appropriateness. Below, we’ll cover some of the titles that managed to pull this off. Though not entirely politically correct, the following games have set the tone of what’s to come in the future of sex in video games.

1. Bayonetta – This action game features everything men love about women – minus the actual sex. However, it’s the games ability to be incredibly sexual without showcasing sex that makes it so appealing. Focused around a sinfully attractive witch with a thirst for blood and revenge, Bayonetta fits the bill of ‘sexy’ in more ways that one. If anything, her skin tight black latex suit and killer ass should be enough to keep you entertained.

2. Fallout: New Vegas – If what you want is full-on sexual content, then look no further than Fallout: New Vegas. Allowing you to do everything from stealing a man’s spouse to seducing strangers, the focal point is even more lewd – trying to lure mutants and humans into prostitution. Call it sci-fi pimping if you will, but Fallout is the closest you’ll ever get to having sex with a robot.

3. Mass Effect 2 – Taking place on a spaceship and satisfying every sci-fi aficionado, one of the best parts of the game involves a sex scene between the captain and his fellow partner. And for those who enjoy a bit of sexual gruesomeness, Samara – an asari Justicar – actually kills her victims by incinerating their insides through intercourse. Let’s just be glad that doesn’t happen in real life.

4. Heavy Rain – This interactive fictional game manages to cross the line by featuring a insinuative rape scene where you can undo the victims bra, forcefully kiss her and even change sexual positions. While I don’t exactly agree to such drastic measures, this depiction is a perfect example of how sex can impact the world of video games. Even in poor light.

The Do’s and Don’ts Of Foreplay

Tuesday, December 14th, 2010

There are too many men out there who slip up during foreplay. They either don’t know what to do and lack the skills needed, or they think that they know too much and go way over the top. When it comes to foreplay, it has to be done right because not all women are wet and ready like those actresses you see on free porn. So take a look at the mistakes below and take notes on the tips because you don’t want to fuck this up!

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Mistake # 1-Foregoing The Kiss

You should try to prolong the kissing instead of going straight for the main event. However, it doesn’t have to be the usual lip locking. Women love it when their men kiss them all over from their neck to their shoulders.

Mistake # 2-Paying Too Much Attention To Her Tits

Women are often uncomfortable when men pay too much attention to their bosoms. Of course they love the attention, but they still prefer that their partners pay attention to other details on their body.

Mistake # 3-Hurrying Through Foreplay

This is a huge no-no! Foreplay should be done in the smoothest and most comfortable manner possible. Women love it when their men spend time exploring every sensitive spot on their body. You shouldn’t go towards her inner thigh if she’s not full prepared for it. It can be really unpleasant for women if they aren’t totally ready for vaginal sex. And you don’t want to ruin the mood because then you wont get any.

Tip # 1-Take Pleasure on Foreplay

You must be able to have fun during foreplay in order to be good at it. Women can actually tell when we’re not in the mood for foreplay, even if there is bits of action like oral sex going on beforehand

Tip # 2: Open Communication

If you don’t know what to do, don’t try and mimic what you see on porn. Just ask her. And be ready to give her anything that she asks of you!

Tip # 3-Dirty Talk

Most guys don’t understand how effective dirty talk can actually be during foreplay. You probably don’t know this, but a women can get highly aroused even with just words.

Tip # 4-Be Smooth

Try and let the whole act blend together smoothly and end in some great fucking. Think about it this way, you wouldn’t want to skip the appetizer and just head straight for the main course, right? And who can forget dessert? Not me! That’s why you want to have some great foreplay so the whole entire act will pan out the way you want it too.