Do: Go about work normally

The cardinal rule when dating a co-worker is to go about business as usual. Don’t let your love life affect your productivity – after all, you had your job before you met your flame, and you’ll have to have a job when you break-up.

Don’t: Bring arguments to work

Friction is negated in an effective work environment, so save the drama for your mama. Our #1 tip to making an office romance work is to leave your arguments at home. Your girlfriend fucked your brother? No one cares…

Do: Sneak romance into the workplace

Days at work can get pretty boring, so feel free to spice up your relationship with a little discreet loving on office hours. And if you’re in the habit of working late, may we recommend sex on the photocopier?

Don’t: Harass unwitting coworkers

If you’re looking to hook up with a coworker remember that the line between friendly flirting and harassment can be thin. Don’t get carried away hitting on someone who isn’t interested – you could lose your dignity and your job.

Do: Acknowledge your status as a couple

There’s no better way to set co-workers against you than to lie about the obvious: if you’re fucking someone in the office, come clean about it. Trust is important at work, and more important than faux privacy.

Don’t: Bring work home with you

Just like leaving arguments at home, make sure you leave your work day at work. There’s no better way to suck the love out of a relationship then to make your bed into the office. If you can get this one right, you’re on the path to dating bliss!

Red Lipstick: Red is the color of lust – people with red cars get into more accidents, people who wear red clothing get into more fights. There’s something of passion in red, and hot red lipstick is designed to attract you to a woman’s lips. So, whether you’re picturing your lady giving you a blow job or simply undoing your pants with her teeth, beware this trade secret!

Panties: If a woman is carries a pair of panties in her purse, that generally means she isn’t wearing any! While we love thongs and g-strings as much as the next guy, there’s nothing like a girl who forgoes panties altogether, and lets you know about it by carrying her pair in her purse. This is a clear sign that a girl wants to be fucked – so what are waiting for! Get over there and bust a move.

Gum: It’s a fact that nearly all men have an oral fixation. Chewing gum has no purpose – there are mints to freshen your breath, there’s food to eat – and women keep their jaws moving for one reason. Exercise so they can suck your cock. Don’t forget that when she’s going down on you later!

A Gun: Undoubtedly the sexiest accessory a woman can carry in her purse. Guns are nearly unnecessary these days since the invention of pepper spray and mace, but dangerous women have dangerous habits. Make sure your girl isn’t a spy before you climb into bed with her (after all, she may leave you tied up) – however dating a girl with a gun is all it’s cracked up to be. A tactile experience that’s bound to get a little wild!

1. “I Only Drink Champagne” – We’ve all been there. You finally build the guts to ask that beautiful – and out-of-your-league – girl out on a date. Upon asking her what she would like to drink, she throws a bomb by claiming to only drink champagne. Great, there goes another $100. Let’s just hope you don’t end up watching free porn at the end of the night.

2. ‘”Do Something!” – There is no appropriate time to hear those two dreaded words used in sequence. Needless to say, if you hear it mid sex, know that you need to work on your performance, and fast. In all other instances, consider your primal instincts. Men should be protective and “do things”, so start doing them before you look like a pussy.

3. “That’s Not The Right Hole’ – Whether you “casually” forgot about her distaste for anal sex or simply can’t tell the difference between the later and standard intercourse, getting a ‘that’s not the right hole” usually means your partner is already ticked off. Good luck with that.

4. “Your Card Has Been Denied” – There is nothing more embarrassing that having a cashier suddenly announce to everyone (and their mothers) that your card has been denied. Bonus points if this happens while you’re with that girl that only drinks champagne. How grand that would be.

5. “Did You Just Fart?” – If you’re out in public, you can at least pretend as if it was someone else. However, if after prepping your bedroom for a night of wild sex – wine, candles and all – you decided to let one out, you might as well just send her home. Try not to eat so much rubbish next time, champ.

This may prompt a lot of you snorers out there to make a quick visit to the doctor because snoring could potentially lead you to have less sex.

Research commissioned by Fisher and Paykel Healthcare, a leading supplier of systems for people with respiratory problems and the treatment of obstructive sleep, found that 50 percent of women said snoring had damaged a romantic relationship.

And it doesn’t stop here! Snoring doesn’t only hurt you chances of having frequent sex, it also puts the culprit in a position where violent attacks and abuse can occur. 70 percent of women admitted to resorting to violence to stop their partner’s noisy breathing. Many of them said they kicked or elbowed their partners in hopes to get them to stop.

Now, you’re probably wondering what the reasoning behind this study is. Well, I can sum it up for you pretty well. Those of us who don’t snore are feeling physically and emotionally exhausted because of sleep deprivation, therefore can’t perform regular duties, like sex, in their everyday lives. Eventually, the relationship becomes stressful for both partners because one is not sleeping and one is not getting sex!

So, instead of resorting to watching free porn online all day as a substitution, try heading to the doctors. Not only can snoring hurt your physical sex life, but it can later lead to erectile dysfunction.

Bottom line is that nothing good can come out of frequent snoring. Imagine yourself never having sex again! Well, that could happen if you don’t get your shit fixed if you’re a snorer.

Once you’ve determined what you want out of the relationship, take a look at our dos and don’t of dating a certified whore. If you don’t follow these points, you could be in for a world of hurt.

DO remember that you’re not special. This girl has 100′s of men to choose from per day, and it’s her job to make you feel like you’re the only man she’s interested in. So bear in mind that she’s playing the odds with you – but that you probably don’t have what it takes to keep up with her.

DON’T call her without announcing your name. Strippers and porn stars have cell phones full of men’s names and numbers, so remember to remind her of who you are, unless you like being embarrassed.

DO carry a lot of cash on you at all times. The sex industry is rich, and if you’re not willing to shell out, you’re dating the wrong kind of girl. In fact, it will probably take you a few dates before she fucks you, and you can expect those dates to cost you more than just renting a hooker.

DON’T ask her about her tattoos and fake tits unless you want to look like a wannabe, or worse yet, another one of her customers.

DO remember to confiscate the battery to her cell phone at some point during the evenings you’re out with her, or it will ring off the hook with other men who are interested in the exact same thing as you are. You don’t want to run the risk that one of them makes her a better offer before you’re finished your date.

DON’T go see her at work unless you have to. It’s best to avoid watching your girl taking off her clothes for other men – unless that’s something you’re into.

If you’ve come though these dos and don’ts undaunted, there may be hope for your love life with a sex worker yet. Remember though, unless you love competition, a normal girl is probably the way to go – as long as she likes it in the ass on a consistent basis.

The city of Atami is an onsen, or hot spring town, that has long been a favorite among honeymooners and tourists. Its popularity has exploded however, as a venue for Rinko and other characters from Love Plus by sporting barcodes that interact with augmented reality (AR) software on iPhones to create characters fans can interact with. The one drawback to Love Plus is that the game doesn’t involve sex, therefore keeping the dating relationships that are established online from reaching another level of reality.

So why no fucking? One reason appears to be that Love Plus was only released on the Japanese market and the manufacturers of the game consider the idea of virtual reality porn immoral. Konami spokesperson Kunio Ishihara is quoted as saying, “The virtual girls can kiss you a a way of communication, but nothing happens when she sleeps next to you at the hotel. We have no intention of trying to sell a product with pornographic elements. I think Love Plus fans would get offended if somebody tried to disrespect his girlfriend like that.”

While having consensual virtual reality sex hardly seems to be a matter of respect, at least Konami are headed in the right direction. With an entire town dedicated to vital reality relationships, it seems like a matter of time before vital reality barcodes are commonplace in Japan. We can only hope a similar, but sexier, version arrives in North America soon.