Posts Tagged ‘boobs’

The Boob Chart

Wednesday, October 19th, 2011

Everybody has their own terms for boob shapes, nearly everyone has heard of the common fruit terms, apples, pears, oranges ect.  I came across this official boob chart and decided that like the Dick Tracy I am, I would find the “real” (term used lightly) boobs to match.

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If you are a boobs kinda guy get the toilet paper and lube ready cause you are about to see 21 sets of titties.

#1 Cranberries

Cranberries

#2  Orange

oranges 2

#3 Peaches

Peaches

#4 Lemons

lemon

#5 Grape Fruit

Grapefruit

#6 Watermelons

Watermellons


#7 Pears

pears

#8 Cucumbers
cucum


#9 Sweet Potatoes

Sweetpotato


#10 Bee Stings

BeeStings

#11 Flap Jacks

flapjacks

#12 Has Beens

Hasbeens

#13 Pointers

Pointers


#14 Mail Bags

mailbags

#15 Under Chinners

Screen shot 2011-10-19 at 6.28.06 PM

#16 Cup Cakes

cupcakes


#17 – Balloons

baloons

#18 Water Wings

water wings

#19 Coat Hooks
Coat Hooks

#20 Blockbusters

Sheyla_Hershey12

#21 Hot Water Bottles

hotwaterbottle

Just to make up for number #21. I present you these :)

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Goin’ Out Packin’

Wednesday, June 29th, 2011

Butch and gender fluid women, as well as any woman who just wants to have some good queer fun might decide to experiment with cross dressing. When they do, they might choose to see what it’s like to put on the clothes of a suit & tie man, a hot guy from the hood, or a rock star. The real adventurous ones might take it to another level and decide to go out packin’.

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Packing in this context, is a slang term for wearing a strap on dildo. To go out while wearing one can give a woman an intense window into what it might feel like to walk the streets, check out chicks or dudes, while managing a raging hard-on. It can be an incredible turn-on.
Some women might really like this because it is an added challenge to trying to pass. If this is something they’re interested in, women have to pay a great deal of attention to manner of walking, sitting, and standing. Not everyone fits a stereotype, but certain sitting positions and ways of holding the body in space tend to belong to either the male or the female realms. A woman can study videos of men she admires or even take some cross-dressing instruction to get good at it.

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Mannerisms are important, but so are the clothes. A large-breasted woman will need to take some time figuring out how best to mask the boobs. Taping works for most, and can best be learned from another drag king if possible. Then, there’s the cock. Adding that to the mix may change the choice of clothing. It may be nice to have a little bulge. Unless the exercise is purely for exhibitionist purposes. She may want to find a way to make it a little more subtle than looking like a pitched tent.

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A few crossdressing women, especially if they like to do it for the stage, would like everyone to see that big bulge. For most, just the feeling of knowing that she has something a little extra between her legs is what the excitement is all about. Bonus fun: Out at the bar, she might brush against her lover, who will suddenly know what’s in store for playtime that night.

Naughty-strap-on-lesbian-sex

Have More Sex

Wednesday, June 15th, 2011

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A lot of people don’t realize that having sex has a lot of health benefits, and the vast majority of people don’t realize that fucking and having an orgasm can boost people’s immune system quite a bit and make them much more healthy and resistant to illnesses that are going around like the common cold and flu. Studies have shown that just having sex once or twice a week will increase the body’s production of a lot of healthy antibodies and hormones that boost people moods, immune systems and well-being.

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Frequent sex has a lot of health benefits, including burning calories which helps to lose weight or maintain a healthy body weight. In addition to that, it is an aerobic exercise, which is good for the cardiovascular system. It’s also a great stress reliever, and it boosts self-esteem. Unfortunately for the ladies who may use this excuse, sex can actually help get rid of headaches. It helps reduce pain, and the release of endorphins can help temporarily relieve cold and allergy symptoms like stuffy noses. Certain hormones that are released during orgasm actually help people to sleep better and reduce insomnia.

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The same hormone that makes people fall asleep after sex is also the hormone that makes people feel attached to others and more intimate and trusting, and it’s often referred to as the ‘Love Hormone’. Those increased feelings of intimacy are very beneficial for happiness and feeling centered. A lot of people probably think that the feelings of intimacy come solely from touching another person, because what’s more intimate than touching someones boobs or genitals? What can be more intimate than a long, deep kiss? Well, science has proven that even though touching does produce emotional feelings of intimacy, there is actually a hormone that is released in our bodies during orgasm which causes those feelings as well. Feeling intimately connected to another human being is very beneficial to a person’s mental health and well-being, because most humans want to feel connected to others, to feel as if they belong and are a part of some sort of community. Feelings of intimacy with another provide all those things. Because of this, a healthy sex life can also help to alleviate feelings of depression and sadness.

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For The Money

Friday, November 19th, 2010

Gwen Turner tried not to fidget while she waited for Miss Alden to read her resume.

“Hmmm,” the tall older woman hummed while flipping the pages slowly. When she was finished she closed the folder, removed her reading glasses, leaned back in her chair and asked: “Why do you want to work for Mr. Valentine, Miss Turner?”

huge-tits

Gwen had experienced enough job interviews to know she couldn’t bullshit April Alden. Every woman in LA wanted to work for Hal Valentine and quite a few did. Gwen knew the money was good and she had heard the stories…both of which she wanted to experience first hand.

“For the money ma’am,” she replied. “Mostly.”

“A reasonable answer,” replied Miss Alden, “and by the way you smile when you say ‘mostly’ I assume you know about the ‘duties’, Mr. Valentine expects his girls to perform?”

“Well, yes ma’am, I’ve heard.”

“Let’s give you a try then,” Miss Alden said standing. Gwen followed the woman into the spacious house.

“This is as far as clothes are allowed,” the tall lady said. “When you’re naked and ready, go join the others out back.”

Five minutes later Gwen walked out to a low big pool, a sparkling blue and vanilla colored back patio, and seven women-all bustier, lankier and more beautiful then the next-strewn about on low cloth lounge chairs, naked as she was. She took one of the empty chairs at the eastern edge of the group, the girls smiled and said hello, then she turned to see Hal Valentine himself hopping out of the water.

The handsome man was naked to, his thick cock twitching with each glance across his bevy and within a few minutes he was fully aroused. He stood up and paced in front of the women; Gwen had heard the term “alpha male” but never until this very minute did she understand its significance. Standing in front of her was one of the richest men in the world and she felt her pussy lips pulsating with the complete knowledge that she’d just about do anything the man asked. She reached down and began to tickle a finger through her hairy pussy, trying desperately to gain Hal’s attention, almost not aware she was doing so. When she glanced over at the other girls, she was surprised to find that each and everyone of them was finger fucking herself in the hope of impressing the boss.

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With a motion of his hand, Hal indicated for a buxom blonde girl to get to her feet. Though she should have been, Gwen really wasn’t surprised when the pretty blonde walked from Hal, got on her knees on Gwen’s lounge chair then slid over Gwen’s belly up to her own sweaty big boobs. As with all of the girls here, the blonde was as hairy as Gwen and the two girls tried to maneuver their muffs so that their clits made quick contact. Moaning into position as Hal and the other girls watched, Gwen made sure she was right on target with her clit to the other girl’s, as the two women spread and ‘met’ violently. Hal looked down and began to jerk off over a real busty brunette who had dipped back her head and opened her mouth to take his hot come when he rained it down over her. Gwen and the blonde stiffened their sweet little pussies flooding and crying out in shared shattering orgasms.

Later that evening, while resting in her room, Gwen heard a knock on the door. When she opened it, April was standing there with a bouquet of flowers.

“From the boss, he was very impressed,” the woman said and

Gwen took the flowers.

“Please thank Mr. Valentine and tell him; I want the job,” she said smiling.

Lactation Room

Wednesday, November 17th, 2010

Donna leaned forward to get a better look at the hose, in the process jiggling her milk-loaded big boobs side to side under her nightgown.

“This looks like it,” Andy said softly, standing up straight from behind her bed. “That little crack prevents the machine from making suction, which in turn, doesn’t allow the milk to be pumped from your breasts. I think you’re going to have to replace that hose.”

“Or,” the lady said, popped her right tit out and flicked at her engorged nipple. A dollop of milk released.

“It hurts a little bit, but it gets the job done, at least for now.”

“David’ll be able to fix that when he gets back,” Andy said gulping at the sudden sight of his neighbor’s bare breast.

“Yeah…” Donna sighed, then looking up at the handsome black man she asked: “Wanna give it a try? I mean, I got you outta the yard, I might as well…”

With trembling hands, Andy sat on the chair next to the pretty blonde and reached down for Donna’s exposed nipple.

“See, it’s easy.”

Of course the couple sprang into immediate arousal and as Andy flicked more drops out of Donna’s huge right tit the woman under him lean back and shaped her lips into a perfect ‘O’.

“Um, let me…” she said and Andy took his hands off Donna as the woman lifted her nightie off. Though her big milky tits had been the object of why Andy had come over in the first place, he couldn’t help but look at down at all of the woman’s perfect full body. Some women blossom in pregnancy, Donna was blooming these two months after giving birth to her son and if Andy was attracted to the woman before, he was raging hard for her now!

Donna’s pussy was a sprig of light pubic hair with a bright pink pair of lips running right down the middle. He wanted to touch it, he wanted to stare, get close, take a picture with his mind, but instead Donna said.

“Scoot up here with me and I’ll let you lick it.”

Andy knelt on the bed and had his head down into Donna’s crotch even before he got on the bed completely.

He first nosed around the outside of the girl’s lips, savoring the sweet smell, while Donna squirmed, trying in vain to get Andy to make contact with her protruding clit. He flicked his tongue at it, tease, taunted and tickled that nub of muscle, then finally, after what Donna felt had to be five minutes but wasn’t even one, Andy buried his tongue deep into her hot hole. Donna came instantly.

“Now you,” she said seconds after coming and Andy lay back. Donna wiggled down his body, undid his jeans and had his hard cock out and in her sweet little hands in seconds.

“Mmmm,” the girl said to the big erection in her hand, dipped her head and took Andy fully into her mouth.

“Oh God,” Andy moaned.

Andy’s neighbor’s woman’s mouth was a vacuum and Andy’s cock was getting the sucking of its life.

Looking down at her sweet innocent face, lips filled with his dark meat, Donna huge chest squished there at his thighs and her wide open wet crotch too far down for him to touch, Andy felt his balls clutch.

“I’m…I’m,” he panted as he fount a hot thick come blast down Donna’s throat.

“Do…Do…” Andy cried as his neighbor kept her mouth on his leaking cock and he gave her more and more and more…

She even reached down to her pussy and with two or three hard fast strokes on her clit, forced another orgasm.

A minute later Andy was wrangling his cock back into his pants.

“Now make sure you replace that hose and I think your pump will work just fine,” he said.
Donna rolled her head to face him.

“Mmmmmmm, I will, but not ’til Mark gets home. Could you check on me tomorrow?’

“Sure, what are neighbors for?” Andy asked and kissed the salty lips under him.

phylisha-anne-gets-hard-interracial-sex

18 With A D-Cup

Sunday, November 14th, 2010

Ever since Amber could remember her tits were always bigger than anyone else’s. By 8th grade she was a solid C-cup, as a junior now she filled a very heavy 36D bra. All this big tit flesh ran in the family, as both of her older sisters were D’s and her mom and two aunts were double D’s. And none of the women were overweight. It was just that everyone was…’busty’.

teacher-sex-1

Amber received a whole lotta’ attention of course. Male teachers always give more notice to heavier endowed girls, and while Amber didn’t overtly flaunt it, she loved to make the boys (and men) in her high school squirm. Wimpy Mr. Fields, her law teacher, literally began sweating when Amber unbuttoned the top two buttons on her blouse, and she had to admit that the man was probably her biggest victim. Teenage boys were easy to turn on, but a fifty-three year old man, that was fun beyond compare!

With two weeks left in the semester all the teachers handed out progress reports to let the students know where they stood. Amber had always done well in school and she figured her grade would stay its usual “B” in law but Mr. Field’s progress report that day indicated she was on her way to a big fat ‘D’, just like her double dees!

As the last bell rang Amber stuck her head round the corner of Mr. Fields’ door, catching the lanky balding man alone grading papers. Quickly unbuttoning her top two buttons, Amber sauntered in and Mr. Fields looked-up, of course managing a quick glance down her cleavage before meeting the girl’s little blue eyes.

“I…I can’t concentrate in class Mr. F.” she began, pouting her generous lips, leaning in far across the man’s desk. “I know you’ve seen how my grades have dipped this semester.”

“Yes, well…” the man tried sitting back.

“I…I have lots of pressures on me,” Amber said wiggling even closer.

“I…Yes, I’m sure a girl your age does.”

“It’s my chest,” the girl suddenly admitted standing up fully then. “I feel like such a cow with these two big things stuck to me, everybody stares.”

The teacher didn’t know what to do so he stood, sat back down and stood again. Amber thrust her chest to her law teacher nearly popping the three remaining buttons stretched across her big boobs.

“See? They’re just so so big!”

Amber bounced over to her stunned sweating teacher, put her hands in his and lifted his long thin clammy fingers, one to each breast.

She felt the guy try and pull away, but she held on to Mr. Field’s hands and whimpered more, helping the teacher knead her firm boobs through her open shirt and bra.

Poor guy, Amber thought, she could hear wheezing.

“The only way you can prove to me that they aren’t ugly is if you suck them.”

Mr. Field rocked back on his heels as Amber broke from him, opened the remaining buttons on her men’s button down, then spread it wide. She revealed her heavy popped up cleavage in the usual under-wire she always wore and lifted the bra up over her shelf of tits, bearing her bare white tits and even then hardening nipples.
“Please Mr. F. Please?”

It was too much for the law teacher to take. He dove in and began sucking and licking what he had dreamed of for so long.

Although he was a little slobbery, Amber had to admit the guy was a good tit sucker, she was growing wet as hell! She looked down to see a large tent in Mr. Field’s trousers, and figuring she’d rather an A then a B anyway, the girl reached down and began to rub the thin man through his pants.

A rather large cock filled her hands and as Mr. Fields continued to eat her tits-God she her clit was really engorging when he did that!-she unzipped the man’s fly, pulled out his warm hard cock and began jerking off Mr. Fields right there in her law class.

teacher-sex

Take My Picture

Tuesday, October 26th, 2010

“Jake, your two thirty is here.” Kiki informed her boss, photographer, Jake Klein.

Without looking up from the proof he was reviewing, Jake replied: “Set her up in studio three and get the lighting set up.”

“Sure thing, boss,” Kiki replied. “You’re gonna like this one. She’s hot!”

Hearing that, Jake finally put down his viewer.

Five minutes later Jake breezed into the studio with his hand out to the stunning brunette in the center of the room.

“Hi, I’m Jake,” he said. “You’ve already met Kiki,” the two women smiled at each other from across the room. “You must be Angela?”

The tall beauty beamed a thin-lipped yet nervous smile.

“These pictures are a gift for your husband?”

Angela shook her head and replied: “Our tenth wedding anniversary is coming up and I wanted to give Dave a surprise.”

“Well,” Jake intoned brightly “I could see why he’d want pictures of you.”

“Well, thanks,” Angela said her chin to her big chest.

“Nothing to be nervous about, ok?” Jake said walking around the woman. Kiki offered him a camera and he continued.

“We’ll start off with a few of you in the clothes, get you used to the camera.”

“Yeah, yeah okay,” Angela sighed looking up finally.

“Here…” Kiki said, stepping to Angela with a smile. She had somehow passed Jake a camera, and now held a delicious looking glass of white wine in her hand. “…before we start.”

Angela took the glass with a smile, drained it, handed it back and for the next five minutes, executed the easy poses Jake suggested while clicking a litany of quick picks. Moving ever so slightly-a cocked hip here, a smile there, her chin to her right shoulder, now left-Angela felt instantly comfortable and infinitely desirable through Jake’s soft urging.

“Wow,” Jake enthused. ” Really natural, perfect. Perfect.”

Snapping more he asked: “Don’t you think she’s a natural, Kiki?”

The little blonde nodded her head enthusiastically.

Jake changed his film while Kiki offered Angela another wine, which she eagerly drank to the bottom of the glass again.

Ready to shoot again, Jake came up to the two women dead center of the room.

“Okay, let’s unbutton that blouse and show a little cleavage. Kiki?”

Angela smiled, again her chin to her chest and Kiki took the empty wine glass while the tall lady reach to open the front four buttons on her shirt.

“Mmmm,” Angela moaned despite herself and Kiki and Jake exchanged a quick glance; the wine, the attention, Angela was loosening up.

Angela was wearing a lacy push-up bra which pushed-up her big tits almost to her chin. ”Wait ’til hubby sees these,” Jake said into his camera.

He flipped off a series of pics all dead center of the pretty girl facing him, getting Angela’s innocent pretty high cheek-boned face and that magnificent cleavage from as many angles as he could.

“Ok, a little more,” Jake said after two minutes of rapid speed shooting.

“Shirt off, okay, bra unhooked; let it slip down a little but don’t take it all the way off.”

Angela peeled of her blouse as slow as she could, yet smiling all the while. Then staring directly at them both, slightl defiant even, the tall brunette reached around back of herself and undid her bra. As Jake has instructed Angela kept the cups of the sliding bra still covering her 36DD’s as the photographer clicked away.

“I’m out again,” the lanky black man said two minutes later and Kiki moved in to help her boss.

“Angela, why don’t you step into the dressing room and see if there’s anything you like,” he added.

Jake’s dressing room was replete with hundreds of different bra and panty combinations of all sizes, colors and styles.

As Jake and Kiki worked out in the main studio they heard Angela fumbling, picking up an outfit and sighing or a few “oh I couldn’ts” from the room. Jake nodded to assistant to go help their latest client.

Angela was giggling when Kiki entered the small changing room. She was topless now and attempting to fit her big boobs into a black bra.

“Here,” Kiki said handing another bra across to the woman…same style but bigger. In seconds Angela had the sexy low cut bra over herself and was pushing her huge tits into the cups…which had cut-out holes in the center of them.

“Oh my,” she said laughing. “I didn’t…”

“These go with it,” Kiki said offering the giggling woman a black thong.

“Go ahead,” Kiki prodded and turned to give Angela privacy. She heard the sound of the woman shucking down her pants, waited the requisite time she assumed it took for Angela to peal off her jeans and then her panties then turned when she heard: “Ok, I think this is right.”

Kiki turned to Angela now in an open-cupped big push-up bra and crotchless panties. She knelt to help the woman adjust and noticed just how perfect a pussy Angela had.

“Turn,” Kiki said and the tall woman over her did so. Kiki adjusted the thong so it fit perfectly in the half of Angela’s equally perfect ass. If she could have she would have knelt forward and kissed it!

“Now, try this.” Kiki said standing and reaching for a small bullet-sized vibrator.

“What’s…?” asked Angela in a slightly slurred voice.

“Just put it,” Kiki said, reached her hand down the front of Angela an while the woman stood smiling, about to kiss woman, Jake’s assistant inserted and pushed the silver bullet up through the crotch-less front of Angela’s thong and into the woman’s vagina.

“Oh oh,” Angela said as Kiki worked the vibrator up in her, just resting it between her perfect slightly silky lips.

Kiki then turned, grabbed the remote control and spun the little wheel to bring the vibrator to life. A low hum filled the rum as Angela began to squirm.

“It’ll get you in the mood,” Kiki said and helped the woman turn to leave the room.

“My…my pussy,” Angela whispered as both women smiled knowingly and came back into the studio.

“Rokay,” the man exclaimed, nodding at Kiki and smiling at Angela. “Now we’re talking!”

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Today is BOOBQUAKE!

Monday, April 26th, 2010

It started as a college student’s snide response to an Iranian cleric’s assertion that scantily clad women cause earthquakes.

But as of last Thursday, it had become much, much bigger.

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New Documentary Attempts to Disrobe Boobs!

Tuesday, February 9th, 2010

Boobs are awesome. Boobs are great. Boobs put a smile on everyone’s face.

Check that out: I just wrote you a little song!

Boobs are one (two) of my favorite things. And I’m not alone; You like them. Your friends like them. Your Dad likes them. You don’t even have to be a man OR a lesbian to like boobs. They are as important a part of our economy as oil. And are even better with a little oil on em! Why, I could go on and on and on and on……

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