Archive for the ‘Celebrity’ Category

Is Bigger Better?: The Best Celebrity Breast Implants

Thursday, November 4th, 2010

Hollywood has always been built on smoke an mirrors – it’s a land where illusion is greater than reality and bigger is always better. Case in point: celebrity breasts. Since the advent of breast implants, breast size has shot through the roof in Hollywood, with breast implants being as prevalent as fake tans since the early 2000′s. Take an organization like World Wrestling Entertainment for example – over 95% of the women in wrestling have breast implants, and it’s now considered a requirement for the job. So let’s take a look at some of the biggest celebrities with boob jobs, in ascending order of breast size.

Victoria Beckham

Beckham

One half of the hottest celebrity couple in the UK, Victoria Beckham has been known to deny that she has fake tits. Her implants tell another story however – while not huge in size, their perfectly round shape make Beck’s breasts undeniably fake. Really, Victoria should sue whoever did this to her – it looks as if she’s has a couple of baseballs sewn under her skin – as she has one of the worst boobs jobs in Hollywood.

Christina Aguilera

Aguilera

Aguilera’s breasts grew somewhere between her Genie in a Bottle phase, and her transformation to dirty denizen of pop sluthood. While she suffers from serious clown-face (a medical condition that makes whores look a lot like Ronald McDonald) these days, her tits still look just right. We give Christina a thumbs up for choosing the perfect size and shape for her girls – maybe she’ll consider a career in porn next?

Pamela Anderson

Anderson

At one time, Pamela Anderson was Hollywood’s preeminent sex symbol. Multiple appearances in Playboy, a sex tape, and the revelation that she has Hep-C later, and she’s just another celebrity is huge tits. She’ll be remembered as an innovator however, as her popularity ushered in a wave of women who got boob jobs to complete.

Heidi Montag

Montag

Heidi Montag is the modern prototype of success in Hollywood. Montag built her star on reality television, and now that her status has declined has turned to plastic surgery for attention. And what a Frankensteinian transformation! Heidi opted to go way too big in every respect, effectively ruining her body and transforming herself into an alien posing as a plastic fuck doll. While Christina Aguilera is a good role model for girls who want breast implants, Montag should be everyone’s warning.

The Most Fuckable Extra Terrestrials

Wednesday, November 3rd, 2010

I’m not going to lie, I’ve always been a closet treky. I love everything about sci-fi and I’m finally ready to admit it. I’m even part of a club dedicated to enjoying everything about Star Trek, Star Wars, and anything else that is incredibly nerdy.

Now, I know most of you are thinking that I’m totally lame for being into all of this nerdy shit, but let me tell you, there are some pretty hot chicks on these shows and in these books that are completely fuckable.

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Connie Conehead from The Coneheads: Sure, she has a huge head, but her face is pretty hot. And if you don’t like the head, you could always put an extra large garbage bag on top of it.

Evie from Out of This World: Remember this hot half alien? I always fantasized about fucking her when she was on the show. But now she’s even older and hotter. Maybe she could freeze time mid-fuck by putting her two fingers together.

LEELOO from The Fifth Element: She’s dumber than a brick, but she’s really hot and lives up to her “perfect being” reputation.

Seven of Nine from Star Trek Voyager: The bedazzled catsuit that she struts around in as the Borg refugee who joined the crew of the Starship Voyager gave me an instant boner every time I would see her.

Starbuck from Battlestar Galactica: This bad ass would be perfect in the bedroom because you know she would be prepared with her whips and chains. Bring it on!

Celeste Martin from My Stepmother in An Alien: This sexy stepmom was the fantasy of all of my wet dreams from 1988 until present day.

Sil from Species: A woman created with DNA codes from outer space who loves to be naked and really likes sex; it can’t get much better than that. However, there is one downfall, what if she is prone to killing her mate afterwards? Well, that’s a sacrifice I would probably be willing to take.

After you’ve read this I’m sure there will be a lot of you that will take an interest in Sci-fi because it’s not just about outer space and de-coding, it’s also about hot chicks in sleek spacesuits that are not only eye candy, but great fantasies for your dreams and when you’re jacking off of course. I’m sure there is also some space alien porn out there that you could get into as well.

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Porn Star’s Wine Passion

Tuesday, November 2nd, 2010

There has always been a certain stigma attached to sex and alcohol. It lowers our inhibitions, therefore allows us to become more sexually open and explore sexual desires we would never otherwise explore.

A lot of porn stars have said that a glass of wine or a shot of whiskey before they are called to go on set really calms the nerves and puts them at ease before they have to strip down naked and fuck some dude that they’ve never even met before in front of a camera crew. If that was me, I would be drinking the whole bottle of whisky before doing that!

For one particular porn star, drinking and sex is more than just something to lower inhibitions. It’s about creating a flavor that is enjoyable and tasty.

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We all know that the world of wine making has attracted celebrities of all sorts who want to try their hands at producing a world renowned taste, but porn star Savanna Samson has taken it too a different level then slapping her name on some cheesy chardonnay.

Her italian red wine has received a score of 90 to 91 out of 100 by wine guru Robert Parker. And apparently in the world of wine, that’s pretty impressive.

You’re probably wondering how a blonde bimbo could know so much about wine. Apparently her sex appeal is not only good for making porn, it has helped her convince Italy’s Roberto Cipresso, a world renowned respected wine maker, to join the project with her.

Samson said she knew she wanted Roberto to make her wine because she, “just loves his passion.”

So, she went to Tuscany and tasted dozens of Cipresso’s Italian grown varieties, then selected a mix of 70 % Cesanese, 20% Sangiovese and 10% Montepulciano.

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The result: a 2004 vintage package under the name Savanna and a label showing her in a see through gown.

Savanna proves that porn stars can be classy, all the while still being slutty. Im sure Samson has opened a whole new realm of opportunity for porn stars all over the world and, not to mention, a better reputation.

Female Athletes: Sex-Icons In The Making?

Tuesday, October 26th, 2010

Sex sells. An old adage, yet true: sex is used to sell everything from beer to cars, and traditionally, waif-like models have been used to do it. Athletes have been increasingly sexualized however, and the 21st century has seen a rise in the number of muscled midriffs in popular culture. After all, what’s hotter than fucking a skinny model? Fucking a tight, toned and primed athlete that will rock your bed like porn star on steroids – that’s what. So let’s take a look at 4 of the hottest athletes in the world today.

Amanda Beard:

Beard

A world class swimmer and Olympic Gold Medalist, Beard set the bar high by medalling in three consecutive Olympic Games. Moreover, she put her porn worthy body on display in Playboy, setting a precedent for other athletes trying to match her celebrity.


Lindsay Vonn
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lindsey-vonn

Lindsay Vonn was lauded as America’s Winter Olympic answer to Michael Phelps in early 2010, and while she didn’t quite live up to that mantle, she did bring home a gold medal. Not only that, but she sparked jealousy in teammates and opponents alike by showing off her tight body in an alluring Sports Illustrated Swimsuit spread to coincide with the games. It’s worth finding too, especially to see her voluptuously muscled ass in action.


Alison Stokke
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Stokke

While Stokke’s athletic pedigree pales in comparison on her beauty, it’s her muscular body that has everyone talking. That and the fact that she’s a pole-vaulter – prompting otherwise respectable journalists to lose their shit and crack: she could vault my pole any time. Amen!


Anna Kournikova
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Kournikova

These days, Kournikova is more celebrity than athlete, but she makes our list for that very reason. Anna is a modern prototype : a failed athlete who has exploited her sex appeal in Hollywood. While she’s been in a relationship with Enrique Iglesias for nearly a decade, he’s bound to come out of the closet at some point. Until then, we’ll be waiting for Anna with baited breath.

Breast Implants: Why Size Matters And When Big Is Too Big

Saturday, October 23rd, 2010

Picture yourself at a fundraising carwash, the kind where you pay ten bucks for two porn stars with big tits to come and clean your windshield with their mammoth mammaries. Now imagine those same sluts throwing their slabs on your Escalade’s windshield and your world going dark. The thought is scary – while we all love breast implants there’s a point at which big is just too big.

Breast Implants

Take Heidi Montag as a prime example. When Heidi first appeared on The Hills she was a skinny flat chested blonde with a big nose. Sure, we would have fucked her (perhaps even multiple times), but without much to talk to we would have moved on to bigger and better things. Heidi may be dumb, but she was smart enough to realize that her value wasn’t nearly as high as it could have been so she went under the knife to have her face fixed and her tits done. The end result was a minor miracle as Heidi was transformed from an average beach slut to a superstar – the kind of big breasted blonde that embodies the American dream.

With that said, when Heidi went under the knife again for an extreme makeover this spring, she pushed her look too far. There’s a fine line between bombshell and alien, and Heidi passed it by having her face pulled tighter than Joan Rivers and supersizing her breasts so that they resembled flesh colored bowling balls. Yes, we’d still fuck her, but much like the original version of Heidi, her stock was greatly reduced.

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So when it comes to tits, there’s such a thing as too big. As a rule, tits shouldn’t block the sun, they should simply allow the sun to highlight their bulging contours. Looking natural isn’t necessarily the prototype that should be aspired to – after all, men love fake breasts – but women who look deformed are quite simply unattractive. Hollywood – take note!

When Sexting Goes Bad

Monday, October 18th, 2010

There is a small part of me that feels sorry for Brett Favre after he got caught with his pants down, so to speak, texting explicit photos of his dick to New York Jets reporter Jenn Sterger. He’s a grown man so he should have known better, but he obviously didn’t think it through before pressing send on his cell phone. If it was a 14 year old girl who sent pictures of her chest to some boy in hopes of making out with him behind the bleachers, than I would whole heartedly feel bad for her, but Favre is a 41 year old married man who shouldn’t be fooling around in the first place. We all can learn a little something from Favre’s actions.

woman-sexy-text-sexting

A couple weeks ago, one of my chick friends brought up a very interesting topic of conversation. She told me that she received a penis picture from a guy she’d been chatting with on an online dating site for a couple of weeks. Basically, she was completely shocked and a little bit disgusted that he would just send this to her out of the blue without her even asking for it.

She then went on to tell me that she forwarded the picture to a lot of her girlfriends and even asked if I wanted to see it. Of course I did cause I wanted to see if it was really something the cyber dude should be flaunting. Of course it wasn’t all that great so it made me think why he would do it in the first place.

A couple days later we all went out for some drinks after work and my friend with the penis picture proceeded to pass it around to about everyone in the bar. Happy hour got a lot happier as people were laughing hysterically at this poor guy’s dick!

I later went home to think. From a woman’s point of view, a man’s junk just isn’t all that enticing. Sure, it has a great purpose in theory, but just looking at it probably doesn’t do anything for them, and I can totally see why. Dicks have nothing in comparison to tits, and I’m saying this from a completely objective stand point.

So what can we learn from Brett Favre and the cyber dude? Next time you think it is a good idea to send a picture of your dick to some chick, be prepared to have it shown to just about everyone in her group of friends and possibly the news, the local newspaper, and blasted all over the internet. You’ll be a porn star, only laughed at. So, my best advice for you is to not even get yourself involved in sexting, even if you trust the person. Unless you don’t give a fuck who is looking at your dick and scrutinizing every inch of it, then all the power to you!

sexting

Lady Gaga Gets Free Porn

Friday, September 24th, 2010

Lady Gaga is known around the world for her sex status and activism for sexual rights. Recently, Gaga made quite an impression while touring though North Carolina, and got an offer that most of us men could only dream of due to the fact that she happened to visit a few porn shops on her week in the town.

During her performance, she told the concert audience how impressed she was by the XXX stores she had visited earlier in the day, it even inspired a new song for her next album. Her comments have already become a youtube sensation online, boasting hundreds of thousands of views.

Her remarks didn’t go unnoticed by local business owners however. A leading porn distributor in the area has offered Lady Gaga a year worth of high quality porn of all sorts. Knudsen from AEBN network made the following comment to the celebrity sex star: ”We think she’ll enjoy being able to take over 100,000 titles—straight, gay and everything in-between—on the road with her. Since she was so impressed by a sex shop here, we can’t wait to show her what North Carolina’s online entertainment options have in store for her.”

Knudsen encouraged Gaga to check out their company at her next opportunity and jumped on the remarks the star had made. Apparently, the innovative porn company has no problem providing gaga with free sex materials and wants to be able to provide Gaga with as much inspiration as possible.

Fluid vs. Fixed: Sexual Orientation

Wednesday, September 22nd, 2010

Gay, straight, bi-sexual; these labels may soon become obsolete. A recent study suggests that nearly 30% of lesbian-identified women have fallen in love with a man. Many women, throughout their lifetime, who at some point identify themselves as a lesbian, tend to weave in and out of their orientation. This refers to not just a fling, but legitimately having fallen in love. In the study of 100 women over a period of 10 years, the majority of women modified the labels associated with their sexual orientation, a trend that increased as time went on. Several participants adopted a preference of being “unlabeled” as they aged, while others have acknowledged a possible shift in their sexual identity in the future.

Take Anne Heche, for example. She was in a relationship with Ellen Degeneres for three years, while both before and after that period in her life she was with men. This is not meant to suggest sexual preference is a “choice,” but rather, that women’s attraction to another is based on more than indoor and the outdoor plumbing that defines the porn industry. It is something behind the eyes that women connect to.

Men, on the other hand, tend to have a more fixed relationship with their sexual orientation. It is far less common for a straight man to fall in love with a penis other than his own, or vice versa. They are more likely to label themselves as a certain sexual preference, and to stick with it for life. This further serves to back up the theory that men are attracted to visual and physical stimuli, while women are turned on by psychological and emotional factors.

It seems the titillation many men experience regarding bi-sexual women has caused a kind of backlash against women who flip flop between gender selections. The notion of two girls together (with room for some voyeuristic cock) may be a common interpretation of these studies, spurring a classic fantasy into a realistic possibility. Fathers, lock up your lesbians! The word is spreading that men may have a chance to spread her, and with all that pussy-lovin’ out in the open, he might inch ever so closely toward the threesome of his dreams.

The Popularity Of Celebrity Sex Tapes On The Rise

Thursday, September 16th, 2010

It wasn’t long ago that a simple celebrity nipple slip or playboy shoot made major headlines in Hollywood. With the rise of paparazzi and celebrity news sites on the Internet however, access to racy photography has become common and such pictures are no longer enough to drive public interest. Enter the celebrity sex tape. Popularized by Pamela Anderson and Tommy Lee in 1998, the celebrity sex tape genre has experienced a rapid rise in popularity in recent years, and such tapes are now being marketed by celebrities to revitalize sagging careers or generate a rise in interest around new projects.

When a sex tape starring Paris Hilton fucking then-boyfriend Rick Solomon (in night vision no less) was released in 2003, it caused a massive public relations stir. In fact, public interest in Paris’ sex tape was so high that it led to Hilton’s role in the FOX reality series The Simple Life, which aired for 3 seasons. Before the world saw her fucking on film, Paris Hilton was seen as a wanna-be actress – afterwards she was seen as a star.

The star-making effect of the Anderson and Hilton sex tapes led to a glut of D-list celebrities trying to capitalize within the genre, such as Dustin Diamond, Amy Fisher, Tonya Harding, Joanie “Chyna” Laurer, Vince Neil and Verne Troyer. While this is an unfortunate byproduct of the popularity of free porn, there were some quality videos produced – see the recent Kendra Wilkinson tape as a prime example.

Of all the sex tapes to gain popularity over the years, Eric Dane and Rebecca Gayheart’s is certainly the strangest. The tape depicts the couple engaged in a sexual situation with former Miss Teen USA contestant Kari Ann Peniche, however the tape is edited to obscure the exact nature of the encounter. What is clear is that all the participants are high – with Gayheart referencing cocaine – check it out if you can find it, it’s bizarre!

With the popularity of sex tapes at an all time high, it seems celebrities will do nearly anything to remain newsworthy in 2010. While we dream of who’ll let their sex life out for the world to see next, let’s kick back, relax and enjoy some porn from our old favorites. Paris, Pam, Kendra – away!

The Human Sexipede

Wednesday, September 15th, 2010

Director Lee Roy Myers and Tom Byron Pictures provide further proof that the adult entertainment industry is capable of creating a porn parody of nearly any major motion picture. The dynamic duo will be taking a cult classic horror film, and turning it into a gang banging, pussy pounding porno.

Fans of horror films have probably already laid witness to the a titillating fuck fest The Human Centipede, so it doesn’t take much imagination to figure out what the porn parody will be called. The Human Sexipede will transform the horrific plot that captivated millions of psychotic freaks around the globe, and turn it into a sex fueled romp.

The original movie revolves around a mad German scientist who sews three people together ass-to-mouth in an effort to satisfy his life-long obsession with conjoined entities. Why did Myers decide to embark on this project? Well, logic. ”I thought, ‘you know what, this is the perfect concept to base a parody around. Anything putting human faces that close to genitals deserves the porn treatment.’

Fans of porn favorites will know Myers others XXX parodies such as The Office, Seinfeld and Reno 911, but according to him, The Human Sexipede might be his Citizen Kane. He says: “In this version, three tourists in Germany are captured by a mad sex educator and he wants to sew them all together, mouth to genitals, and I am doing a slapstick version. It is a true parody and I think it’s one of the best things that I’ve written, at least one of the funniest things that I’ve written.”

The full length feature film will surely be a treat for anyone twisted enough to like the original, and desperate for a fuck fantasy adaptation. The porn flick will star such busty beauties as Sunny Lane, Amber Rayne, Keni Styles, and Danica Dillan. It will surely be a treat for any porn fans whom want to see their favorite porn stars sewn pussy to mouth.