Popular with giggling dorm-room friends who’ve had too much to drink, or a couple looking to add a little spice into their marriage, the suburban mink go-to is the threesome. A common porn-born fantasy for a hetero man-getting double of what he wants and none of what he doesn’t-and the truly adventurous sex-capade for a gay couple-especially if they invite a hetero man or woman into their bed-three people having sex with one another is mathematically difficult and often times leads to a lot more questions than simply answering the itch of curiosity.
For casual daters the threesome won’t usually blip on their radar of possibilities, beyond the night it happens, or the desire it might show for one or the other for some sort of same sex liaison, depending who is introduced into the sex melee. A committed couple, married partners, anyone in a long term romance invites a opening for much larger questions about their relationship in the need they express for someone else to join their sex life. These questions partners might not want to address might very soon be if they continue even with simply talking about a threesome.
It’s not just the partner one invites to one’s bed that is the wild card, it is also the desire and passion partners might be witness to once they have another next to them in bed. There are a whole host of reactions we might have to a new lover, or hear our lover experience which could run the gambit from unnerving to arousing; and no one is ever ready for either. Even the most secure lover will notice their partners reactions, good or bad.
While the ménage is quite the divergent angle on the more traditional romance, the variances that are possible are simply too much for some couples, even couples who fantasize about swinging or bringing a best friend into their bed. No matter what our pasts might have allowed, every new relationship has its own rules and a threesome might not fit well with the one’s implied by a couple. Will the introduction of a new person be something that lasts, will it be strictly sexual? Could this situation turn into a polyamorous lifestyle?
The addition of a third person into a couple’s sex life can add excitement or just too any dam questions.